


Taste and Taboo

by Arcadias_Fire



Series: Fractures [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Coming Out, Consensual Underage Sex, Enthusiastic Consent, Eventual Romance, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Frottage, Incest, Intercrural Sex, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, Loki (Marvel) Gets a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki (Marvel)-centric, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Multiverse, POV Loki (Marvel), Polyamory, Porn with Feelings, Sex Education, Shower Sex, Tattoos, Underage Drinking, Warning: Loki (Marvel)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:08:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25455961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arcadias_Fire/pseuds/Arcadias_Fire
Summary: Loki loves his life. Really! He has no rules, no ties. His brother has a family that Loki can visit if he wants. Loki travels the world, writes his stories and articles. But sometimes he wishes for grounding. For love. For a boyfriend that won't treat him like trash...Maybe, just maybe, his wishes can be found at home. But only if he's brave enough - or weak enough - to take them.
Relationships: Jane Foster/Thor, Loki & Thor (Marvel), Minor or Background Relationship(s), Tom Hiddleston/Loki
Series: Fractures [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2100501
Comments: 20
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I once said I would never post anything like this, and like every other limit I've put on myself, I've broken it. To be completely, totally clear, the relationship in this story is illegal and immoral by the standards of most societies, and for good reason. Personally, I think it's almost impossible for a relationship like this to not be exploitative, but it is NOT exploitative here. This is, as much as possible, a relationship of equals. If you have any concerns, please read the tags. The minor dub con is towards the older person, not the younger. If this isn't what you want, please feel free to walk on by.

Loki’s nephew would be the death of him. He was completely certain of this. 

When the boy was born, Loki had been away at university. Thor sent him an ecstatic email with a dozen pictures. Thor’s firstborn was the spitting image of their mother as an infant. A tiny golden boy with a halo of blond curls like Frigga’s, and bright blue eyes like Thor’s. Loki smiled and wrote back that he was happy for Thor and Jane, and that he looked forward to meeting the child soon. 

That “soon” took five years, but when Loki met young Tom, he was a ball of energy and words that were far too long for someone who had yet to go to school. Jane didn’t believe in talking down to her own children, so she spoke like a physicist to her son and even to her newborn daughter. Tom was named after Jane’s grandfather, while baby Freya’s name was an homage to Thor and Loki’s family. 

Loki sat with Thor and Jane on their back porch watching as the little boy made up stories for his infant sister. 

“He looks like you, you know,” Thor said when Jane went inside for a phone call. “He looks like you when you were his age.” 

“Really?” Loki’s eyes followed the boy with his riot of blond curls. “You could have fooled me with hair like that.” Loki ran a self-conscious hand over his long black locks, so unlike his brother's gold. 

Thor laughed. “If I didn’t know that you’d never touched a woman with intent in your life, I’d ask where you were nine months before he was born.” 

Loki choked on his wine. “Thor, must you?” 

Thor’s giant hand came down on Loki’s shoulder like an anvil from a cartoon, nearly crushing him. “It’s mother’s genes in both of us, I know.” 

Loki shook his head. But when small Tom climbed into Loki’s lap asking for a story, he could barely recount his tale for looking at the boy’s cheekbones below the baby fat. Loki was six years younger than Thor, and his half-brother, though Thor never acted as though that made a difference. Loki indeed saw their mother’s face in his nephew’s own. His blond curls were far lighter than Frigga’s slivering ones, but still, the resemblance was there. 

Another five years passed before Loki saw his nephew and niece again in person. Little Freya took after her mother, with Jane’s big brown eyes and scientific outlook. Tom was a slim reed of a boy, still full of energy and big words. He was still thrilled to see his Uncle Loki. 

“I’m surprised you remember me,” Loki told the boy, who now came up to his chest. 

“You told me the best stories,” Tom replied. “I’ll always remember them.” 

Loki grinned and saw his smile mirrored in his nephew’s face. 

Thor was right, the boy did look like him, and had some of Loki’s spirit too. Jane told Loki over a glass of wine in the kitchen that Tom had a gift for mimicry and practical jokes. Loki laughed at stories of itching powder and near-perfect impressions while the boy blushed and escaped his mother’s embarrassing tales. 

Another three years passed before Loki was able to visit again. 

Little Freya wasn’t so little anymore and was off at science camp. Thor and Jane wanted to have some time to themselves, so Loki offered to house-sit for his brother and sister-in-law and watch his teenage nephew who was home from school. It wasn’t difficult, and honestly Tom hardly needed any supervision. Loki was mostly there so his brother wouldn't worry. 

“Uncle Loki, can we get pizza?” 

“Of course. Do you want to watch a film as well?” 

Tom grinned. “That would be wonderful.” 

They watched a stupid action film and ate pizza with too much grease. Loki let the boy try his cider, though only a taste. 

“This is much better than Dad’s beer,” Tom said as he returned the bottle. 

“It is. Beer is vile,” Loki replied, taking a swig. “That you already know that says good things about your intelligence and taste.” 

Tom giggled and looked away, a blush on his cheeks. “Mum only drinks wine, and she’s brilliant.” 

“Exactly. Your father may be an oaf and have terrible taste in alcoholic beverages, but he does have good taste in women.” 

“Uncle Loki, I don’t think that’s very nice.” 

Loki grinned. “Whoever said I was nice?” 

Tom giggled even more and settled down on the sofa. “Do you have a girlfriend?” 

“Nope. Never have.” Loki took another swig of cider. 

“Oh. Why?” 

Loki gave the boy a sharp look. “Did your parents not explain this to you?” 

Tom squirmed. “Mum said you have a boyfriend.” 

“Well, I did, but I don’t anymore.” 

“Why?” 

“We broke up. That’s generally how these things work.” 

“Oh. I suppose that makes sense.” 

Loki sighed. “It doesn’t make you uncomfortable, does it?” 

“No, of course not. I just hadn’t really… thought about it, I suppose.” Tom chewed on his lower lip for a moment. “Is it any different?” 

It took Loki a moment to parse this. “Well, the parts involved are different, obviously, but I don’t really think so. At least in terms of how relationships work.” He laughed. “Come to think about it,  _ I’ve _ never really thought about it from the straight end of things.” 

“So you’ve always known you didn’t fancy girls?” 

Loki nodded. “I was about your age when I realized that I was perfectly fine at boarding school, thank you very much, and didn’t miss the girls in the slightest.” 

Tom giggled, then sobered. “Can… can people like both?” 

“Oh certainly,” Loki replied, silently cursing Thor for not having this conversation with his own son. “My ex, Stephen, he’s bisexual. Or pansexual. Whatever he’s chosen to call it this week.” Loki threw up a hand. “Honestly pretty much any combination of likes and dislikes is possible.” 

“Oh.” 

Loki thought about asking what had caused all of these questions, but he didn’t want to embarrass the boy any more than he already was. He vividly recalled having a very similar conversation with his mother almost twenty years ago, and would rather not have his nephew feel that same, burning shame. Suddenly Tom not talking to Thor or Jane made a lot more sense. “If you have any questions, I’m happy to answer,” Loki said in a quiet voice. “But if you’d rather just drop it, I’m fine with that too. I won’t judge.” 

The boy nodded, cheeks flaming. “I… I’d rather not, just now.” 

Loki nodded and turned his attention back to the trashy movie. Tom was only fourteen, after all, and a bit shy about some things. He’d expressed that he was happy to spend time with Loki rather than chafing at restrictions to his teenage freedom. Loki realized that he was “the cool uncle” and considered himself lucky. 

The week the two of them spent together was fun. More fun than Loki'd expected. It reminded him of childhood summers spent with Thor, only Loki was the elder now. Somehow the eighteen year gap in their ages didn’t enter into it. He usually felt positively ancient around children, but instead, Loki remembered what being a teenager was like. 

They swam in the backyard pool. Went to the cinema a couple of times. Stayed up too late talking about anything and everything. Loki hadn’t spent so much time alone with someone other than a boyfriend since Thor got married. When Tom fell asleep with his head on Loki’s shoulder, he thought nothing of wrapping his arm around the child’s thin shoulders and letting him sleep. 

He really should have seen it all coming. 

o0o

Another eighteen months passed. Loki traveled a lot. He wrote travel articles to pay his bills while he worked on novels that he couldn’t quite bring himself to try and publish. All he needed was freedom and a laptop, and he was fine. Or so he told himself. 

“Please Brother, we’d love to have you come for Christmas.” 

Loki sighed and stared at the ceiling of his low-rent boarding house. “Do you actually want me to come or does Jane want some time alone with you?” 

Thor laughed, too loud even with the spotty mobile connection. “Both. And more. The children would love to see you.” 

Loki thought that Freya wouldn't be that excited about Loki’s presence, but Tom likely would be. He must be nearly sixteen by now. 

“Very well. I’ll come.” 

“Thank you, Loki!” 

Loki rolled his eyes, though of course Thor couldn’t see it. “Let me check my schedule and I’ll email you my plans, alright?” 

Loki arrived at the airport a week and a half before Christmas. Jane met him just beyond the security check in. 

“Hi Loki, thanks for coming.” Jane drew her brother-in-law into a surprisingly tight hug. Loki had a hard time remembering that Jane was tiny, her personality was so big. “Thor’s at home with the kids.” 

“I didn’t expect the whole family to show up just to fetch me from the airport, Jane. I appreciate having the ride at all.” 

She flashed him a smile as they walked away from the terminal. “No problem. It’s kind of nice to get out of the house for a while.” 

Loki nodded. “Is Thor driving you up the wall?” 

“No, but Freya and Tom are sniping at each other like crazy. I’m really glad that by the time Freya’s a teenager, Tom will be in college.” 

Loki laughed. “Thor and I fought constantly for fifteen years. Age had very little to do with it.” 

“Yeah.” Jane fell silent for a long moment. “I think something’s bothering Tom, but he won’t tell me what it is.” 

“Oh?” 

“Something at school, maybe? I don’t know.” Jane threw up her hands. “He’s at the age where he thinks his parents don't know anything.” 

Loki stifled a laugh. “Do you want me to talk to him?” 

“I don’t think asking about it is a good idea, but if you could just… be there for him? He thinks the world of you.” 

“I’m not sure why he’d think so, but I’m happy to spend time with him.” 

Jane grinned. “He wouldn’t shut up about you for months after you house-sat summer before last. He thinks you hung the moon.” 

Loki shook his head. “I’m just different enough to be interesting.” 

Jane gave him a look that said “sure Loki, whatever you say” but kept her mouth shut. 

On the drive back to Jane and Thor’s home, they discussed Jane’s research, Loki’s articles, and Thor’s most recent acting gig. Loki had always liked Jane. Even during his teenage years, when he was bundled up in jealousy of having his brother “stolen” from him, Loki knew that Jane was good for Thor. She was brilliant, beautiful, and kind. But she took no bullshit from anyone, even the 6'3", overly-muscular Thor. 

By the time Loki was best man at their wedding, he realized that Jane and Thor belonged together. He knew they’d had ups and downs over the years since they’d been married, but what couple didn’t? 

But the time they arrived at the house, Loki felt relaxed and actually happy to be with his family. He followed Jane in from the garage, suitcase in tow. 

Thor ambushed him the second he walked in. 

"Brother!" The ensuing hug cracked Loki's ribs and squeezed the breath out of him. 

"Nice to see you too, Thor." 

Thor pulled away and grinned. "I'm so glad you agreed to come." 

Loki returned the smile. "How could I possibly refuse?" He looked around the hall. "Now, where are my favorite niece and nephew?" 

Freya came running in a moment later. It was so easy to see Jane in the girl's face. "Hi Uncle Loki." She gave him a smile and a hug. "Happy Christmas." 

"And to you, Freya." He kissed the top of her head. "I'm pleased to see your mother's vocabulary hasn't corrupted you past mending." 

Freya giggled while Jane let out an exasperated sigh. "There's nothing wrong with saying 'Merry Christmas'," Jane replied. 

Loki raised an eyebrow. "I'm just happy your children speak properly." 

Jane rolled her eyes. "Whatever." This had been an ongoing argument for years. Loki sniggered. Making fun of his sister-in-law's accent and vocabulary was one of the few completely innocent joys he had. 

Loki sat down on his heels so his head was below Freya’s. "Where’s your brother, sweetling?” 

The girl rolled her eyes, looking very much like Jane as she did. “He’s hiding in his room.” 

“Oh?” 

Freya nodded sagely and leaned in to whisper in Loki’s ear. “He left as soon as he heard the car.” 

Loki’s eyebrows went up. That had… implications. “Should we let him hide and wait for him to come out on his own?” he asked his niece in almost as quiet a voice. 

Freya shrugged. “He’s an idiot.” 

Loki’s lips twitched. “That’s not a very nice thing to say about your brother.” 

“And?” 

Loki burst out laughing. “Oh little niece, you are indeed the younger child.” He looked up at Thor, who was trying not to laugh. “You have my apologies, Thor.” 

“Accepted,” Thor replied, reading between the lines. “And my apologies to you for being an idiot older brother.” 

“Mmmm, I suppose I can forgive you.” 

Thor laughed and the group moved into the living room. Jane provided Loki a glass of wine while Thor took his suitcase upstairs to the guest room. Freya chattered happily about her classes at school while Loki made the appropriate sounds of interest. The child was clearly very advanced in her studies, but given that her mother was a genius, that was hardly surprising. Thor failed to come back for several long minutes, until Loki wondered if he’d fallen down a well. 

Eventually Thor returned, looking defeated. He dropped down beside Jane on the love seat, a beer bottle loose in his fingers. 

“He won’t come down?” Jane asked. 

Thor shook his head. “He won’t say why.” 

Loki frowned. “I’ll see what I can do.” He got to his feet and trotted upstairs. Loki was familiar with the layout of the house. He glanced into the guest room and saw his small suitcase on the bed before moving down the hall to Tom’s bedroom door. He knocked. 

“I told you, I’m not coming down,” came the muffled, angry reply. 

“That’s why I came to you.” 

There was a long pause. Loki heard movement in the room, but nothing he could track. Finally, the door opened. 

Loki started. The last time he’d seen Tom, the boy had been only a few inches taller than Jane. Now he could look Loki in the eye easily. Loki might have an inch or three on his nephew, but no more than that. His face has lost much of its baby fat, making his cheekbones sharp. Loki looked him up and down, taking in tight jeans and a tighter blue tee-shirt, until he dragged his gaze up to meet confused blue eyes. 

“Uncle Loki?” Tom’s voice cracked. 

“Sorry. You… you’ve grown more than I expected.” 

Tom blushed and looked away. “I can’t help it.” 

“I know. And I’m sorry for pointing it out. I always hated when people drew attention to that kind of thing.” He allowed his gaze to drop again, and refrained from commenting on Tom’s voice having changed since the last time they spoke. “I’m sure your father has mentioned this, but you look almost exactly like I did at your age.” 

Tom nodded, still blushing. “I’ve seen the photos.” He looked up at Loki again. “You’re sure you’re not secretly my dad?” It sounded like he was trying to make a joke out of it, but there was real fear under the jesting tone. 

Loki laughed. “Certainly not. For one, I would never do that to my brother. For another, I’ve never even  _ kissed _ a woman, let alone donate any part of myself for procreation.” 

Some of the tension left Tom’s shoulders. “Good. I just… I was… worried. It would be weird.” 

“I understand. I think it’s really that we both resemble my mother, though honestly you look more like her than I do.” 

Tom patted his blond curls self-consciously. “I’ve seen photos of Nana when she was young too, but… it’s not really the same, is it?” 

“No.” Loki hesitated. “Is this why you were,” Loki paused. He wanted to say “hiding” but that had more negative connotations than he wanted. “Reluctant to come downstairs?” 

Tom blushed even more. “That… that was part of it.” 

Loki smiled. “To the best of my knowledge Thor is absolutely your father. I’m honestly not even that closely related to you, given that Thor’s only my half-brother. It’s just a strange genetic quirk that we look so much alike.” Loki’s eyes drifted over the chaotic riot of blond curls again. “The hair is the giveaway. Should I choose to breed, there would be little chance that said child would have anything but dark hair.” He met Tom’s eyes again. “Does that help?” 

Tom nodded. “Yes. I mean… I wasn’t  _ that _ worried, but…” he took a step forward, out of his bedroom and into the hall. And into Loki’s personal space. “It would have been… weird.” 

Loki drew the boy into a hug, which was instantly reciprocated. “Yes, it would have been weird.” Poor boy. Well, not so much a boy as a young man. It seemed silly to call someone who was nearly six feet tall a boy. Tom was still gawky and not entirely in control of his limbs, but Loki could clearly see the man he’d grow into. Loki pulled away from the hug and looked him in the eye again. “Are you ready to come downstairs now?” 

Tom hesitated, hunched in on himself now that he wasn’t being hugged anymore. “I… yes. Okay. Give me a couple of minutes?” 

Loki nodded and patted his cheek. “Take as much time as you need. Supper won’t be for a little while yet.” He turned to walk away, then turned back. “We have plenty of time, if you want to talk about any of this more. Or anything, really.” 

Tom nodded. “I’d like that.” He still held himself awkwardly, like he didn’t quite know what to do with his hands. “I’ll be down in a few.” He gave Loki a smile, shut the door to the bedroom.

Loki shook his head and trotted back downstairs. He took his seat on the sofa and reclaimed his wine. 

“Any luck?” Jane asked. 

Loki nodded. “He’ll be down shortly.” 

Jane and Thor both relaxed. 

“Thank you, Brother. I’m glad you were able to persuade him.” 

Loki gave Thor a smile. “That is what I’m best at, isn’t it? Though honestly, he didn’t take much persuading. He just needed to know that someone other than a parent was there for him.” 

Jane nodded as though this made perfect sense to her, while Thor scowled. A gentle squeeze from Jane wiped the expression away. Loki was certain that Thor would track him down eventually and try to pry the whole story out of Loki later, but that was par for the course. 

About five minutes later, Tom padded downstairs to join them. He looked around the room, lower lip caught between his teeth. “Sorry.” 

Jane smiled. “I’m glad you were up for joining us.” 

Tom looked at her, at Thor, then at Loki, as though he expected that one of the adults would shout at him. He crept to the sofa and sat at the far end from Loki, leaving enough space for Thor between them. He curled in on himself further by drawing his knees up to his chest. He looked flushed and furtive, but that was understandable. He’d argued with his father, which never went well, even though Thor was a much kinder man than his own father, or Loki’s. 

The conversation picked up again once Tom had settled himself. Loki continued with his story about a recent visit to Japan. 

“There were only certain onsen I was allowed to go to, can you believe it?” 

“What’s an onsen?” Freya asked. 

“It’s a natural hot spring. The Japanese build bathhouses around them,” Loki explained. 

“Why wouldn’t they let you into all of them?” Jane asked. The worry and humor lurking in her eyes told Loki exactly why  _ she _ thought he wouldn’t be allowed.

“Not what you’re thinking.” Loki grinned. “No, it was because of my tattoos.” 

Thor frowned. “What?” 

“They're taboo in Japan. Only ‘gangsters’ have tattoos. Tourists have to be very careful about where they visit if they have visible ink.” 

“Can’t you just cover it?” Jane asked. 

“Well, the one on my back would be difficult to disguise no matter what, but many onsen have nude bathing. Not all of them, and many have separate bathing facilities for men and women.” Loki smothered a laugh at his family’s shocked expressions. “Their taboos are completely different than ours.” 

Thor laughed. “Being naked in front of strangers is fine, but having art on your skin is not?” 

Loki shrugged. “Not all societies work the same way.” 

“What do you have tattooed on your back?” Tom asked. “I don’t remember seeing anything.” 

“I acquired it since I saw you the summer before last. It’s a raven. It covers my whole upper back, so it’s hard to miss if I’m not wearing a shirt.” The raven had taken hours to complete, but it was beautiful and worth every last pence Loki spent on it. 

“Oh.” Tom looked at Loki’s back as though he could see a tattoo through his shirt. 

“You are not getting a tattoo, young man,” Jane said in her “mum” voice. “Not until you’re out of school, anyway.” 

Tom blushed, tore his eyes away from Loki and down to his lap. “I didn’t say I wanted one, did I?” He glanced back at Loki. “Did it hurt?” 

“Yes. Getting a tattoo is fairly painful, especially over the spine. But some people get a euphoric effect afterwards.” Loki grinned. “Those are usually the people with the most ink.” 

Tom covered his mouth and giggled. 

The conversation drifted to topics involving fewer needles and more science. By the time supper was ready, they’d moved on to politics. Loki steered the conversation back to science again once it became obvious that a row would result if they kept talking about politics. 

After supper, Loki helped Thor clear the table while Jane put Freya to bed. The girl was old enough that she didn’t really need to be put to bed, but it was a routine that both enjoyed. 

“What was he upset about?” Thor asked in his most indoor of indoor voices. 

Loki glanced over his shoulder. Tom was sitting on the sofa reading. The boy was far enough away that a quiet word wouldn’t be overheard. “He… he was concerned that I might be his father, not you.” 

Thor’s eyebrows went up. “Truly?” 

Loki nodded. “Utter bollocks, I know, but look at him! How could anyone  _ not _ think that if they saw the two of us together.” 

Thor frowned. “They’d be more likely to think you’re his brother rather than mine.” 

“I  _ am _ old enough to be his father, Thor. I’m not that much younger than you.” 

“I know that, but you don’t look it.” 

Loki shrugged. He was over thirty, but looked like he was in his early twenties. He still had his ID checked if he was in a country with strict drinking laws. “Still, that was at least part of the concern. I don’t know the rest yet.” 

“Thank you. I was afraid that something was seriously wrong.” 

Loki patted his brother’s shoulder. “You remember what it was like. You never wanted to tell Odin or Laufey anything.” 

Thor grimaced. “I remember.” 

“You’re a much better father than either of them, but you’re still a father. I have the privilege of coming and going as I please. I don’t have to discipline anyone. I can be there the way that Frey was for us.” 

Thor smiled a sad smile. “I miss Uncle Frey.” 

“Me too.” 

Thor cleared his throat. “I’d best go up before Jane comes looking for me.” 

“Goodnight then.” 

Thor ruffled Tom’s hair as he went past, then disappeared up the stairs. 

Loki walked into the living room. “Would you like some company or shall I leave you to your reading?” 

Tom closed his book and looked up. “Whatever you prefer.” 

Loki took a moment to try and read his nephew’s expression. He was fairly certain that Tom wanted him to be there, but still felt awkward about it for some reason. Hell, at fifteen, he probably felt awkward about nearly everything. 

Loki sat on the opposite end of the sofa and swung his legs up so that they faced one another, their feet not quite touching in the middle. “What are you reading?” 

Tom showed Loki the cover of his science fiction novel. “Have you read it?” 

Loki shook his head. “Not yet.” 

Tom set the book aside and stared at Loki for a long moment. 

“What?” 

“Did you tell him?” 

Loki blinked. “Yes.” 

“Why?” 

“Thor was concerned that there was something truly wrong. I assured him that there wasn’t.” 

Tom chewed on his lower lip for a moment. “If asked you not to tell my parents something, would you still tell them?” 

Loki thought about this. “It would depend on what it was and why you didn’t want them to know. In all honesty, I can only think of a very few things that would cause me to ignore your wishes on the matter, and all of them involve you being injured by the lack of their involvement.” 

Tom nodded. “I suppose that makes sense. Well, I’m not taking drugs or involved in a gang or anything that parents always seem to be worried about.” 

“I didn’t think you were.” 

“No?” 

Loki smiled. “You have better taste than that.” 

Tom laughed and covered his face with his hands. “I don’t know, my tastes are pretty strange.” 

“My dearest nephew, please remember who you’re talking to.” 

“I’m very aware.” 

"Then you know that there's very little that shocks me." 

Tom nodded. He looked Loki over, then returned his gaze to the book in his lap. "I… I… I think I'm going to head to bed." 

It wasn't that late, but Loki nodded. Tom was second guessing himself, and no good would come from forcing the issue. "I'm fairly tired myself. Even with as much traveling as I do, it still takes it out of me." He  _ was _ a bit tired, but Loki could see that Tom wasn't ready to talk about whatever it was that was bothering him. Loki got to his feet. "Goodnight, then?" 

Tom scrambled to his feet and leaned in to give Loki a hug. "I'm really glad you're here." 

Loki returned the hug. "Me too." 

Tom pulled away, blue eyes searching Loki's face. Loki wondered what he was looking for. The boy opened his mouth, shut it, opened it again. Tom shook his head and looked away. "Goodnight, Uncle Loki." 

Loki watched as his nephew scarpered for the stairs. There was certainly something else going on, but Loki only had a vague idea of what it might be. Honestly, the most likely thing was that the Tom was gay and trying to figure out how to deal with that. Thor and Jane were outspokenly progressive, but that didn’t necessarily mean that coming out to them would be  _ easy. _ Loki recalled being utterly terrified to tell his mother about his own sexuality. Frigga loved him without any reservation, and she’d accepted his homosexuality with the same devotion. Laufey had been… less accepting, but that was to be expected. 

So, how to make this easier for Tom? The best thing would be for him to simply spend time with the teenager and watch for any sign of what was bothering him. That had been Loki’s plan anyway, so there was no need to change anything. 

With that thought, he headed for bed. 

  
  



	2. Chapter 2

The holiday progressed as one would expect. Loki spent time alone with each member of the family at least once. He took Freya ice skating, went shopping with Jane, and went to Thor’s local pub with him one evening. He spent far more time alone with Tom, trying his best to be a supportive uncle to the distressed teenager. The more time they spent together, the more convinced Loki became that something was wrong. Tom opened up, clearly having fun and enjoying Loki’s company, only to shut down and hide the next moment. 

Two days before Christmas, the family planned to go visit one of Jane’s friends from work. Tom threw an absolute fit, refusing to go. Jane shouted at him. Thor shouted at him. Tom was reduced to tears and refused to leave his room. 

Loki sighed. “You might as well go. I’ll keep an eye on him.” 

Thor and Jane looked at one another in a silent conference that only long-time couples could have. 

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Jane asked. 

Loki shook his head. “Not at all.” In all honesty, he had no desire to visit someone he didn’t know anyway. “I’ll make sure the house is still intact when you get home.” 

Thor, Jane, and Freya left shortly thereafter. 

Loki sat down in the hallway outside Tom’s bedroom. Once he heard the car pull away, he tapped on the door. 

“They’re gone.” 

The door thumped as though someone hit it from the inside. “They… You stayed behind?” 

Loki snorted. “I had no investment in going in the first place. I’d much rather be here with you.” 

The door cracked open. Loki could see one blue eye and far too many golden curls. “You would?” 

“Of course.” 

The door opened the rest of the way so Loki could see Tom sitting inside, a mirror to how he sat in the hall. “Thanks.” 

Loki smiled. “I would have been going out of filial obligation only.” 

Tom snorted. “At least you have the choice.” 

Loki refrained from stating that Tom too had a choice, since he didn’t go. “Why didn’t you want to visit the Smiths?” 

Tom rolled his eyes. “Their daughter is about my age. She fancies me and I can’t stand her.” 

“Ah.” 

Silence fell. 

“You don’t think that… that there’s something wrong with me? For not liking her?” 

Loki shrugged. “Why should I? I don’t know the girl, but  _ I _ certainly wouldn’t want to be around someone who fancied me who I did not care for.” 

“Even if she was pretty?” 

Loki looked over at Tom. “You are well aware of my opinions towards women. It makes not a jot of difference how pretty they are.” 

Tom blushed. “I… I don’t know if…” 

Loki held his breath. 

“I don’t… I think I’m…” Tom rubbed his hands over his face, then looked at Loki. “How do you know if you’re in love?” 

Loki started. This was not the question he’d expected. “That’s complicated. You can love someone and not be  _ in _ love with them. You can also be very  _ attracted _ to someone and not be in love with them. I suppose…” Loki looked up at the ceiling. “The most useful definition I can think of would be that you want to spend a lot of time with them, want to have sex with them, and care about their opinions as much as your own.” He shook his head. “It’s more complex than that. I’ve known people who said they were in love with someone they didn’t want to sleep with, but I think they’re in the minority. There are people who would  _ never _ value someone’s opinion equal to their own, but those people are bellends, and you don’t want to be in a relationship with them anyway.” He glanced over at Tom. “Does that help?” 

“I… I think so.” Tom looked down at his hands, then up at Loki again. “I’m sorry that you’re stuck here with me.” 

Loki shook his head. “Believe me, I would much rather be here.” He got to his feet. “Do you want supper? You must be starving.” 

Tom nodded. “Now that my stomach isn’t in knots anymore, yes.” 

Loki offered the boy a hand and pulled him to his feet. “I don’t particularly fancy leftovers. Chinese?” 

Tom grinned. “Sounds wonderful.” 

Loki ordered food and they settled down in the living room to wait. 

“Why haven’t you asked me what I plan on studying at university?” Tom asked out of nowhere. 

“Because I always hated that question,” Loki replied. “It always seemed like the sort of thing that adults would ask children because they couldn't be bothered to ask a proper question. It’s the teenage equivalent of ‘and what do you want to do when you grow up?’” Loki said this in a sickening sing-song voice, then shook his head. “It’s bollocks. People who ask that kind of thing don’t care about who they’re talking to, they just want to make conversation and to seem like they care.” 

Tom laughed. “Why are you the only adult I know who still remembers what it was like to be a teen?” 

“Thor would tell you that I’m still a child.” 

“He hasn’t said that to me.” 

Loki shrugged. “I never felt like giving those things up. Why should I? I don’t have a ‘proper’ job. I don’t have a family. Hell, I don’t even have a boyfriend. I do what I want, not what others expect of me.” 

“That sounds nice.” 

“It gets lonely,” Loki admitted. “That’s part of why I’m here. To… to ground myself.” 

“Why…” 

“Yes?” 

Tom cleared his throat. “Why don’t you have a boyfriend at the moment?” 

“I…” Loki chewed on his lower lip for a moment. “I haven’t found someone I want something permanent with. It’s difficult, since I travel so much.” 

“You didn’t use to travel that much.” 

“No, I didn’t. I could… I can see myself settling down with the right man, but I don’t know if that’s a possibility.” Loki shrugged. “I try to not let it bother me.” 

“That does sound lonely.” 

“As I said, that’s why I’m here.” 

Tom started to respond, but the doorbell rang, announcing the arrival of food. They ate at adjacent seats at the dining room table, stealing food from one another’s plates, giggling like madmen. Once Tom had consumed his own weight in fried rice and dumplings, they moved back to the sofa. 

Loki told Tom some of the stories that he wouldn’t dare share in front of Freya, and others that he might even avoid telling Thor. Tom giggled and blushed, but kept encouraging Loki to go on. 

The subject of Loki’s tattoos came up again when he told Tom about the various artists he knew. 

Tom seemed to be trying to see over Loki’s shoulder. “Could… Could I see it? Your raven tattoo?” 

“I am not going to take you to get a tattoo,” Loki warned. “Your mother was quite clear on that.” 

“I’m just curious.” 

Loki raised a sceptical eyebrow. 

  
“Really! I just want to see it.” 

“Very well.” Loki pulled his long sleeved tee-shirt off and turned around. He pulled his hair over his shoulder to reveal the whole of the raven. He and the artist had spent hours perfecting the design. The raven took up the whole of Loki’s upper back, the tips of the wings over his shoulders, and the head up the back of his neck. The feathers weren’t completely black, but held touches of green and purple to add the illusion of iridescence. The raven’s eyes were ice blue, its beak open. 

“It’s beautiful.” 

“Thank you,” Loki replied. “My only regret is that I can’t see it every day, but the back was really the only place the design worked.” 

Loki felt movement behind him. 

“Can I… May I touch it?” Tom’s voice was much closer now. 

“If you’d like.” 

Cool fingertips brushed along Loki’s shoulder blades and he shivered. The fingers were snatched away. 

“Sorry, did that tickle?” 

“No, it’s just a bit chilly. Feel free.” 

The fingertips came back and Loki resolutely held himself still. It  _ was _ cold without a shirt, but that hadn't been the only reason he’d shivered. It was unfortunately easy to ignore that the gentle hands on his skin belonged to a  _ teenager _ who happened to be related to him by blood. 

“It doesn’t feel that different than your normal skin.” Tom’s voice was close and a bit breathy. 

Loki bit the inside of his cheek. “Feel the beak.” God, why had he said that? The back of his neck was even more sensitive than his shoulders. Curious fingers traced the edge of the wings, to the bird’s neck - and Loki’s own - then to the beak. Loki bit down harder. 

“Oh! It does feel different.” 

Loki nodded. “It was done using a different kind of needle. A wider one which changes the texture of the skin more.” He was quite proud that his voice didn’t shake at all. 

“Does it feel different to you?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Does it hurt all the time? Or is it like a scar, so you can’t feel that skin well anymore?” 

“Ah. That actually varies from person to person. I’ve never met anyone who said their tattoos hurt after they healed. I think that it doesn’t make much of a difference for most. Some people get less sensitive, others more so.” God, it felt like Tom was petting the bird’s feathers, and therefore Loki’s skin. “I am in the latter camp,” Loki admitted in a quiet voice. 

The fingers halted, and Loki heard a quick intake of breath. He expected Tom to pull away. That would be the polite thing to do. The correct and moral thing to do. 

Instead, both hands ghosted over the whole of the raven, sweeping from neck to shoulders. Along the wings, down to the body, down to the feet, tracing each claw on its own. Loki dropped his head to his knees and bit his lower lip hard enough to draw blood.  _ Tell him to stop. Tell him this is turning you on and he needs to stop right now. This is wrong wrong wrong… _

Loki leaned away, but Tom’s hands followed him. 

“Please stop.” 

The hands were gone in an instant. “S...sorry.” 

Loki shook his head and put his shirt back on, automatically pulling his hair out from under the fabric. Loki dropped his head back to his knees, but he couldn’t move beyond that. 

“Did… did I do something wrong?” 

Poor child, he sounded like he was about to cry. “No. I did.” 

“What? What do you mean?” 

Loki shook his head again, rocking his forehead against his kneecap. “It doesn’t matter.” He couldn’t explain this. He couldn’t allow his nephew, his brother’s  _ son, _ to see the monster that lurked in Loki’s head right now. “You should go to bed.” 

“I did do something wrong.” 

“No!” 

Loki felt Tom jump at Loki’s outburst, but he didn’t dare turn around. 

Loki gritted his teeth. “This is my fault, not yours. Please… I’m sorry.” 

“But...” 

“I can’t… please, just… go back to your room” 

“Why? If it’s not my fault, why do I need to leave?” Tom was crying now. Hell. 

“Because I…”  _ I’m old and weak and you’re young and beautiful and untouchable. _ “I’m sorry.” Loki straightened his spine. If he forced the boy away without explanation, Tom would feel abandoned and hurt by an adult that he trusted. Loki took deep breaths until he felt more in control. He turned around. The look on Tom’s face broke his heart. Tears fell from those beautiful blue eyes, lower lip caught between his teeth, like he was trying to bite back the pain. 

“I’ve ruined our evening. I’m sorry.” Loki reached out to wipe away a tear, but snatched his hand back when he realized what he was doing. 

“I don’t understand. Please tell me what I did wrong?” Tom reached out and took the hand that Loki snatched away a moment ago. Loki, weak as he was, allowed the contact. “Was it because I touched your back? I thought you’d like that.” 

“I did,” Loki replied miserably. “That’s the problem.” 

“Oh.” 

The silence seemed to last for a thousand years. 

“I… I wanted you to like it. I wanted to… I wanted to make you feel the way you make me feel.” 

Loki snapped his head up and stared at Tom. The teenager’s eyes were nearly black, his pupils were so dilated. Tom licked his lips, and before Loki could do more than open his mouth, Tom was kissing him. 

Loki’s brain screamed at him. _Stop stop stop!!! This is not alright! Thor will_ ** _kill_** _you. You will go to jail, then to Hell. Stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop_ _stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop stop..._

Loki’s body, however, paid less than no attention to the frantic scrabbling in his mind. It felt like centuries since he’d kissed anyone like this. The boy tasted like ginger and sunshine. Like a beautiful dream. Like home and love and lust, all bound together in something he couldn’t possibly understand. Without meaning to, Loki cupped Tom’s jaw with both hands, sweeping his thumbs along the boy’s cheekbones. Tom moaned into Loki’s mouth and slid his tongue against Loki’s lips. Loki let out a tiny whimper, and deepened the kiss further. 

The next thing Loki knew, he was on his back on the sofa, six feet of very obviously horny teenager on top of him. There was no mistaking the hard cock pressed against his abdomen. Whatever else might be going on here, Tom clearly wanted this. 

No. No, it didn’t matter. Tom might want this. Want this  _ desperately _ if the moans and gasps coming from the boy’s throat were any indication. When Tom shifted enough that their cocks were grinding together, Loki groaned, but broke the kiss. 

“We… we can’t do this.” 

“Who says?” 

Loki tipped his head back so the other’s questing mouth couldn't reach his own. “Everyone says. It’s illegal and immoral. And your father will kill me.” 

A dark chuckle reached Loki’s ears. It was eerily similar to his own laugh. “When have you ever given a fuck about morals or legalities?” Tom’s hips rocked against Loki’s. “You want this as much as I do.” Tom dove in again and bit the side of Loki’s neck

Loki gasped, and bucked his hips up. Tom let out a tiny “ah!” and thrust against him again. Loki melted under the onslaught of lips and teeth and tongue against his neck. And the increasingly frantic grinding of Tom’s cock against his own. It took long minutes to get his control back enough to speak. 

“It doesn’t matter what I want!” Loki grabbed the other’s shoulders and pushed him up so that Tom had to look him in the eye. “I have to be the responsible one here. You are underage, my brother’s son, and I cannot allow this to go on!” 

“Loki,  _ please.” _ Tom moaned his name like a benediction. “I have wanted this since I was fourteen. Please please please let me do this!” 

Loki’s hands lost their strength. “I…” 

Tom dove back in and caught Loki’s lips in a hungry, desperate kiss. He shifted his hips, pushing until Loki spread his legs enough for Tom to slide between them, thrusting against Loki’s trapped cock and balls. The teenager shifted his attack again, and went after the side of Loki’s neck, sucking a bruise onto the pale skin. 

“Please touch me. Please, I want you so desperately. I know it’s wrong, but please…” 

Again, Loki’s body acted without his permission. His hands slid down Tom’s back to his indecently perfect arse, and squeezed. 

Tom screamed, his whole body going rigid against Loki’s, then melted onto him again. He lay panting against Loki’s chest. 

Loki tilted his head up and away. Tom had come, just from the frantic, dry friction, but Loki was not fifteen  _ (nearly sixteen, _ his traitorous brain whispered) and wasn’t so lucky. He was so hard he ached, desperate for release, but to act on that would be worse than anything else he’d done so far. 

But God, it had been a long time since his last hookup. And he’d been trying to avoid thinking about the beautiful boy living down the hall, resolutely turning his mind away from sex in any context as a result. And now the object of his desire was sprawled on top of him like a broken doll. 

Tom shuddered and looked up at Loki. “You’re so gorgeous.” 

Loki blinked and unaccountably blushed. He shook his head. 

“No, you are.” Tom scooted up, rocking against Loki’s cock. Loki bit back a moan and closed his eyes. “You didn’t…” Tom shifted his hips again. “You didn’t come.” 

“I’m afraid that gets more difficult as one gets older.” Tom rocked against him again, purposefully this time. “You… ah! You don’t need to…” A whine escaped Loki’s lips. “Don’t need to… do that…” 

“I want to,” Tom muttered against his lips. “Want to see you come so badly.” He shifted so that his thigh pressed against Loki’s groin. “If  _ I _ could make you come, God…” 

Loki shuddered. He couldn’t help but thrust up against the body atop his own and let out a tiny “ah!” of pleasure with every motion. 

Tom kissed down the side of his neck. “I have thought about you every time I touched myself for the last year and a half. You’ve made me come more times than I can count, you know that?” 

Loki shook his head again. He wasn’t sure what he was trying to deny anymore. God, he was still fully dressed, hadn’t come yet, and this was already the best sex he’d had in years. Why was he fighting this again? 

“And knowing that you were just down the hall? Fuck. I just wanted to… It sounds awful.” 

Loki chuckled, but the laugh turned into a breathy groan. “We are well be... - ah! - beyond awful.” 

Tom nuzzled his ear and pressed his thigh against Loki’s cock. “I wanted to crawl into bed with you while you slept so I could wake you by sucking your cock.” 

Loki shivered and moaned. “Ff…” 

“God, I think I wanked to that three times in one night. Just imagining what your face would look like when you came, and that I made you look like that...” Tom shuddered against Loki. “Please, I want to make you come.” 

Loki’s mind filled with some kind of melange of what Tom was saying. The boy creeping into his room in the middle of the night, lifting the blankets and climbing in. Hot, wet mouth engulfing Loki’s cock while Tom frantically jerked his own, wanking to Loki’s sleepy moans. He knew what Tom sounded like when he came, though he didn’t know what the boy’s face looked like. Now he pictured it. Blissed-out ecstasy on his face, all while he had Loki’s cock in his mouth.

The image was too much. Loki ground his hips against Tom’s thigh and cried out as he came, and came hard. 

“Oh fuck,” Tom whispered, awe in his voice. “Oh my God.” 

Loki was aware of more movement while he drifted back in from the post-orgasmic haze that surrounded his mind. The sound of a zip and several gasping breaths settled around him. When he realized what was happening, Loki’s eyes went wide. Tom now knelt above him, left hand planted next to Loki’s ear, while the right was busily engaged with his own cock. Part of Loki was vaguely jealous of the teenage boy refractory period. The rest of him was absorbed by the gorgeous sight of Tom’s lip caught between his teeth, the flush on his cheeks, eyes rolling back in his head as the boy sought another orgasm. It was hard not to feel some pride there. Tom was so affected by Loki coming under him that he was gagging for it  _ again. _

Tom whined, a frustrated sound rather than a needy one. It seemed so clear that he was just on the edge, but couldn’t quite push himself over. Loki knew that feeling all too well. 

He reached up and pulled Tom down into a kiss, devouring the boy’s lips as he gasped into Loki’s mouth. Tom turned away, his breath harsh in Loki’s ear. “So… soooooo close.” 

“Beautiful boy,” Loki whispered in his best bedroom voice. “Come for me.” 

Tom’s eyes fluttered, his mouth dropped open and he screamed again. Loki could feel the wet through his shirt, hot against his chilling skin. 

It was the sexiest thing ever seen in his life. 

He was so, so fucked. 


	3. Chapter 3

Loki’s brain was trying to pull him in several directions at once. As was usually the case for him, sleep tugged at the corners of his orgasm-addled consciousness. Another part reflected that he rather enjoyed the sex and wouldn’t object to doing it again once he was capable. The last part - locked in a small, soundproof room in the depths of his brain - screamed at him that he’d just done something awful and for God’s sake,  _ do _ something about it! 

However, given that he was weighed down by a relaxed, post-orgasmic teenager laying on top of him, doing anything was problematic. 

“Tom. Tom wake up.” 

“Not asleep.” 

“You were snoring.” 

“Wasn’t.” 

Loki sighed. “Do you really want to have your parents come home and find us like this?” 

“No.” 

“Then get up.” 

“Can’t.”    
  


“Yes you can.” 

“Nope. Not at least for another half hour or so. Not even you are that sexy.” 

Loki smacked himself in the forehead. “I was not suggesting that…” 

Tom snickered. 

“I really don’t need to be reminded of how young you are right now.” 

“Sorry.” 

Tom still didn’t move. 

“Get up or I’ll tickle you.” 

“Fine.” Tom levered himself up so that he sat above Loki, over his thighs. He tucked himself back into his jeans and made a face. “Urgh, I need to clean up.” 

“As do I.” Loki sat up. “I think a load of laundry might be in order.” 

Tom glanced over at him and saw the very obvious white stain on Loki’s black shirt. “Oh. I see what you mean.” He blushed. “Sorry.” 

“Let’s get cleaned up first, then we can figure out what we’re going to do.” 

Tom got up and headed towards the stairs. Loki followed a moment later. Thor and Jane’s house was large, had probably been monstrously expensive, and had a large, American style laundry room on the first floor at Jane’s insistence. 

Normally, Loki wouldn’t have thought twice about stripping down in front of someone he’d just shared orgasms with, but this situation was unique in his experience. He went into the guest room to take his soiled clothes off and find something to replace them. A pair of pajama bottoms would do for the moment. 

He met Tom in the hall outside the laundry room. The boy had a towel around his waist, and that was it. Loki couldn’t quite keep himself from checking him out. Tom was a bit more slender and shorter than Loki, but their build was virtually identical. He was muscular in a casual way which Loki found very appealing. A build that said “I like sport, but I don’t need to workout.” 

He looked up to see that Tom was doing the exact same thing to him, eyes travelling over Loki’s moderately muscled torso. Of course Loki had barely changed physically in the last ten years, whereas puberty had done a number on his nephew. 

Oh God. His nephew. Who was fifteen. Who he’d just had sex with. Well, by a certain definition of sex.  _ At least I didn’t fuck the boy. Hell. _

“I… I didn’t plan this, you know,” Tom stammered after a moment. “I wasn’t trying to get you to stay home with me and… and seduce you.” 

Loki raised an eyebrow at that. “No?” 

“Well… not… not today.” Tom caught his lower lip between his teeth, then gave Loki a sly smile. “I had every intention of trying to seduce you at some point.” 

Loki sighed and rubbed his forehead. “What made you think I’d be receptive to that?” 

Tom shrugged and took Loki’s clothes to put into the washer. “I didn’t really know, but I thought… I thought I saw that you were… looking at me like that. LIke I was a man, not just your little nephew. I wanted that so badly.” He paused to set the machine, then turned back to Loki. “I wasn’t sure that it would work, obviously. I knew that it was a risk, but when you let me touch you… I thought that it was working.” 

“It was,” Loki admitted. “I would never in a thousand years touched you like that without your encouragement, but I would have to be blind to not see that you’re beautiful. I tried to ignore it, but…” He shrugged. “But here we are.” 

“Here we are.” 

They looked at one another for a long moment. The panicking part of Loki’s mind still gibbered in a corner, but that corner seemed farther away. Tom smiled at him. A million watt smile that could charm just about anyone. Loki should know, it was his smile too, after all. 

“We should get cleaned up,” Loki said after a moment. “More than just our clothes.” 

Tom nodded and held out a hand. “Come shower with me? Mum and Dad won’t be home for at least another hour.” 

“I want to, but… I don’t think I’ll be able to focus on anything else if we do. And we do need to talk this over before Thor and Jane get back.” 

The corners of Tom’s mouth turned down, but he nodded. “Alright. I’ll be quick then.” 

Loki nodded and went back to the guest room and its ensuite. He pinned his hair up, since it would take forever to dry otherwise, and gave himself a quick scrub. He let the water run cold at the end, hoping to clear his mind. 

He knew that there were times that he’d done dubious things while he was horny, things that he regretted moments after he’d come. Usually those regrets involved lying to people, or not being as courteous as he should be. Loki wasn’t feeling any of that regret right now, and he wasn’t sure why. This was one of the most questionable things he’d done in a long, questionable life, so why didn’t he want to go strangle his past self like he should? 

Loki dried himself off and put on warm pajama bottoms and another long sleeved tee-shirt. The bath that Tom and Freya shared sat between their rooms, opposite to the guest room. The door was open, the bath empty, so Loki tapped on Tom’s closed door. 

“Come in.” 

Loki obeyed, closing the door behind him. Tom was also dressed for bed. It wasn’t that late, but it seemed pointless to put proper clothes on again. The boy sat on the edge of his bed, drying his hair with a small blue towel. 

“May I sit?” 

Tom patted the bed. “Go ahead. No reason not to be comfortable.” 

Loki nodded and sat. “I have questions and we have options. Are you willing to discuss those things?” 

“Of course.” Tom set aside the towel. “Ask away.” 

Loki took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’ve gotten the impression that you don’t wish for this to be a… a one time thing, is that correct?” 

Tom nodded enthusiastically. “I… If that’s what you want too.” 

“And if I said I didn’t want that?” 

The boy swallowed hard and blinked back tears. “Oh. Well, I guess… I mean, I did talk you into it. And it’s dangerous for you. So I understand.” 

Loki held up a hand. “I’m not saying that I… God, I should have stopped this before it started, or walked away already. But I’m not going to abandon you. I care about you too much to do that. I need to know what you want. What you expect.” 

“What I want and what I expect are two completely different things,” Tom replied. “I expect you to… to never look at me again. To disappear for another few years and forget this ever happened.” 

The look on his face broke Loki’s heart. “And what do you want?” 

“I want to be your boyfriend. I want to live with you and love you for the rest of my life. I know that probably can’t happen, but that’s what I want.” He looked up at Loki with big, teary blue eyes. “I’ve been in love with you for a year and a half, Loki. I know I was just a kid the last time you saw me, but you were so kind. It felt like… like we were friends. You really listened and explained things, and it was wonderful. And this has been so nice. Having you here and spending time together. I thought… I thought that I’d made it all up. How wonderful you are. But I hadn’t imagined it. You really were that kind and understanding.” 

Loki realized his mouth was hanging open and snapped it shut. “Nobody has ever said that to me.” 

“No?” 

He shook his head. “I’m more likely to be informed that I’m a selfish arse who doesn’t deserve to breathe the same air.” 

Tom looked horrified. “Who told you that?” 

“Just about everyone I’ve dated has called me a selfish arse, or words to that effect. The breathing the same air analogy was Stephen.” Loki sighed. “I stopped looking for a boyfriend shortly thereafter.” 

Between breath and the next, Tom surged across the bed and pulled Loki into a hug. “I’m so sorry.” 

It was impossible not to melt into that hug, and Loki didn’t even try to resist. “I’m not good boyfriend material. You need to know that. Even if we could… I’m rubbish at it.” 

“I don’t believe that for a moment.” 

“And how much dating experience have you had?” 

Tom drew away. “Some?” 

Loki raised an eyebrow. 

“Really! I… Well, I guess dating isn’t quite the right word. I’ve been with a couple of boys at school.” 

Loki’d been certain that he was not the boy’s first kiss - he kissed far too well for that - and likely not his first… lover? Was that really the right word? “Were these one time things or a relationship? It makes a difference.” 

“Ummm… one of each,” Tom muttered. 

“That’s something.” Loki recalled the hormone-soaked years away at school as a sort of haze. Most of his encounters had been of the ‘one time thing’ variety, but not all. “I don’t want to make it sound like you don’t know your own mind, but I need to know that this hasn’t… damaged you. I care about you very deeply, and that has nothing to do with what we did on the sofa.” 

“I know. That’s why I think…” 

Loki held up a hand and Tom fell silent. “What you’re asking for is a relationship that we would have to keep secret for the rest of our lives. We would never be able to acknowledge one another in the eyes of the law, society, or even our own family. You aren’t of age yet. I could go to jail for loving you, and I don’t believe that either of us want that.” 

Tom shook his head. “Of course not.  _ I _ seduced  _ you, _ after all.” 

“You might be able to make that argument, but I’m afraid that given our previous relationship, it’s fairly likely that it wouldn’t matter.” 

Tom shrugged. “I’m nearly sixteen anyway.” 

“It would still be illegal. Besides, your being of age will not stop your father from beating me half to death. That will likely not change by the time you’re  _ my _ age.” 

“I suppose not.” 

This was one of the most surreal conversations Loki had ever had. He sighed. “I should walk away from this. I should do exactly what’s expected of me for once.” 

“I know you’re probably right, but… when have you  _ ever _ done what you should rather than what you wanted to do?” 

Loki scoffed. “A few times, but not many. Still, it’s the right thing to do.” 

“What if I wasn’t related to you? What if I was say, twenty rather than almost sixteen. Would that make a difference?” 

“Those factors are very important.” 

Tom waved a hand. “I know that. There’s nothing we can do about being related, but I will continue to age. But isn’t it worth looking at it as though you were just seeing me as boyfriend material? If you wouldn’t want me anyway, doesn’t that make the choice easier?” 

Loki grimaced. “I suppose you have a point.” It was probably impossible to completely separate his reactions to a family member from them as a person, but he could try. “It’s been a long time since I’ve thought about what I even want in a boyfriend, to be honest. Once Stephen left, I suppose I… gave up.” 

“Oh. I’m sorry. That sounds awful.” 

Loki shrugged. “I prize intelligence in a partner, not necessarily empathy. He had a great deal of the former and very little of the latter.” He looked down at the duvet on Tom’s bed and traced a fingertip around one of the circles that made up the design. “Intelligence, having common interests. Compatibility in terms of living arrangements is more important than one might think. Attractiveness, though of course that’s highly subjective.” He sighed. “I could do with some empathy, I think.” 

“I think you could too.” Tom reached out and took his hand. “So?” 

Loki had never been good at denying himself anything he really wanted. “You’re right. Of course you are. You and I have far more in common with one another than I do with anyone, even my brother. You’re certainly intelligent. And, as self serving as it is, very attractive.” Loki looked up and met smiling blue eyes. “I don’t suppose you could trick your mother into developing time travel to age you up a bit?” 

“Sorry, I don’t think that would work unless she manages to figure out the whole wormhole thing she’s been working on for the last decade or so.” 

“It’s probably best to not count on that,” Loki replied, a hint of laughter in his voice. “God, what have I come to?” He shook his head. “I’ve never particularly cared for being a responsible adult in the first place, but this…” 

“Listen, you don’t have to decide anything right now. I think we can both agree that my parents don’t need to know any of this, and you leaving now would be extremely suspicious.” 

Loki tilted his head in agreement. “Changing anything would be suspicious. Thor and Jane are concerned about you, and I offered to spend time with you to help. Is it safe to assume that what’s been bothering you was in fact your interest in me?” 

Tom nodded. “I really did think you might be my dad, and it was very seriously messing me up.  _ That _ seemed wrong.” 

Loki laughed. “I suppose it’s good to know where the line is. I have no issue lying to my brother, I’ve been doing it for years and I’ve gotten quite good at it. The question is, how good an actor are you?” 

“Fairly? I mean, I just have to be me, right? Just me who hasn’t managed to fulfill a years-long fantasy.” Tom’s eyes travelled over Loki in a distinctly hungry way. “Not that I don’t have a few more…” 

Loki flushed. “I would love to hear about those, but I suspect that Thor and Jane will be home soon.” 

“Probably.” Tom sighed. “I just want you to give me a chance, alright? I can’t force you into doing something you don’t want to, but can’t we just see what happens?” 

Loki refrained from mentioning that Tom could blackmail him into doing just about anything by threatening to tell Thor that Loki had taken advantage of him. That apparently hadn’t occurred to Tom, proving that he was still something of an innocent. On the other hand, letting Tom have most of the agency in the relationship was refreshing, and even liberating. “Very well. I’ll continue to provide moral support as I have been, and neither of us shall breathe a word of this to anyone. Agreed?” 

“Agreed. I won’t promise to not try and seduce you again, though.” 

Loki grinned at his nephew’s smile. “Just be careful about it.” 

“I’m always careful.” Tom’s smile faded down into something small and tender. “May I kiss you?” 

Loki couldn’t help but think that question should have come up hours ago rather than now. “You may.” 

The brilliance of Tom’s smile came back as the boy leaned in and kissed him. Their kisses before had been frantic, desperate things. This kiss was slower, softer. Loki let his eyes fall shut, and allowed himself to drift into the kiss. Tom tasted minty now, but still like home in a strange way Loki couldn't quite put his finger on. He cupped Tom’s cheek, noting the light stubble under his palm, and swept his tongue across the boy’s. Tom moaned into Loki’s mouth and pulled closer, climbing into Loki’s lap. Loki brought his other hand to the boy’s waist to steady him. More, long, sweet kisses later, Tom was panting against Loki’s mouth, eyes dilated in the dim room. 

“You are by far the best kisser I’ve ever kissed.” 

“I’d hope so, given that I’ve been practicing for longer than you’ve been alive.” 

“Mmmm.” Tom placed a tiny kiss on Loki’s lips. “It shows.” 

“You’re doing quite well yourself.” 

The boy grinned. “Thanks. I’ve been practicing too.” He leaned in again to prove it. 

Somewhere in the midst of increasingly urgent kisses, Loki heard a door slam shut below them. Tom jerked away. “They’re home.” 

Loki nodded. “I’ll go talk to them. You might as well stay here.” He left one more lingering kiss on the boy’s lips before he got to his feet. 

Tom’s eyes traveled along Loki, before focusing on his crotch. “Umm… you might want some pants or something.” 

Loki smiled, well aware that he was half-hard again, and it showed through his pajama bottoms. “That’s what dressing gowns are for, my dear nephew. Goodnight.” 

“Goodnight.” 

Loki shut the door behind him and heard Tom lock it from the inside. He did indeed grab his warmest and thickest dressing gown before heading downstairs. 

Loki caught Thor in the kitchen, putting something in the fridge. “How was supper at the Smith’s?” he asked. 

Thor grimaced. “Cecelia - their daughter - kept asking where Tom was.” 

“Ah. He told me that the girl fancied him.” 

“She does. And I now understand completely why he didn’t want to come.” 

Loki nodded and hopped onto one of the bar stools. “Thor, I think you might want to consider not bringing him to any parties with girls his own age for a while.” 

Thor sat on one of the other stools. “Oh?” 

“He didn’t say as much, but I think Tom might be gay.” 

“But… Why didn’t he tell me? Or Jane?” 

Loki rolled his eyes. “Because you’re his parents, oaf. I told  _ you _ well before I could bring myself to tell Mother.” 

“I suppose that’s true.” Thor drummed his fingers on the countertop. “You say he didn’t tell you. How do you know?” 

“I don’t know for certain,” Loki replied. This was technically true, since it was perfectly possible that Tom liked girls as well. “But the way he talked about some of his mates at school made me think that they might be more than ‘just friends’.” Again, completely true, but taken out of context. “I think that’s why he feels safer with me. He knows I won’t judge.” 

“As though I would judge him for that!” 

Loki held up a hand. “I know that, and I’ll encourage him to talk to you and Jane about this, but he’s not there yet.” 

Thor’s broad shoulders sagged. “Thank you for telling me, Brother. I’m very glad you’re here for him.” 

“I’ve always been fond of the boy, it’s no hardship to spend time with him.” 

“I appreciate that.” Thor rubbed his bearded chin for a moment. “Is there any chance you might be able to stay a little longer? Jane wants to spend some time away from the kids. I was thinking that Mother would be able to watch them, but there’s a girl who lives next door…” 

Loki’s heart leapt. “I was planning on going back to London for a while, but I could stay if it would make your life easier.” 

“If you don’t mind it just being the two of you, it would. Freya has her heart set on seeing her grandmother.” 

Loki smiled.  _ In for a penny, in for a pound. _ “I’d be happy to.” 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which Loki tries to be responsible while still sleeping with a teenager.

Christmas with Thor and his family was far more pleasant than the last few holidays Loki had spent alone. Thor remembered all of the magical parts of Christmas and suppressed the bad ones. Odin showing up drunk at their door and having a shouting match with Laufey - who was also drunk - until Mother shouted at them both and kicked Odin out, came to mind. 

Thor never seemed to think about that particular Christmas Day. 

Christmas traditions in the current household were a blend of the Scandinavian and British Christmases Loki and Thor shared as children, with a heavy dose of American traditions thrown in from Jane’s side of the family. 

It was all rather nice. 

Loki and Tom played a careful game. It reminded Loki of being at school and making sure that the prefects never saw any of the boys in a compromising position. This meant hidden kisses in doorways, and no more than kisses. 

At Loki’s suggestion, Tom threw a fit about Loki being his “babysitter” while everyone else was away. “I’m fifteen, not five! I don’t need someone to look after me!” 

Thor glared. Jane sighed. 

“We just want to make sure you’re safe,” Jane said. 

“It’s either you stay here with your uncle, or you go to Nana’s with your sister,” Thor added. 

Tom pouted and kicked the sofa. “Fine. I’ll stay here with Uncle Loki. I guess.” 

The boy was indeed a fine actor. Loki was so proud. 

Thor, Jane, and Freya left first thing Boxing Day morning. Loki and Tom had breakfast in the dining room, pretending perfect innocence in case the family returned. Apparently nothing was forgotten, so they had the house to themselves. Loki put soiled dishes into the dishwasher and turned around to find himself bracketed against the counter. 

“You wanted something?” 

Tom leaned in closer. “Yes please.” 

Loki grinned and slid his hand up into Tom’s curls to draw him into a kiss. The boy plastered himself against Loki’s torso, so Loki spread his legs to allow Tom to get even closer. It also brought them to the same height, allowing them to fit together like puzzle pieces. A tiny part of Loki’s mind speculated if Tom had finished growing yet, or if he’d be as tall or taller than Loki. Thor had a good inch on Loki, so it was possible that his son might be just as tall. 

“I have spent the last few days wanting you and going mad from it,” Tom muttered against Loki’s lips. “Just those kisses were driving me completely mental.” 

“Mmmmm,” Loki hummed. “That was rather the idea.” 

Tom groaned and bit the side of Loki’s neck. “How are you the sexiest person on the planet? It’s just not fair.” 

Loki shuddered under the praise and teeth on his skin. He slid his hand down Tom’s back to rest on his arse. “This is the sexiest thing here, I hope you know.” He squeezed the perfectly muscular bum and pulled Tom closer. 

He was already hard -  _ teenager _ \- and ground himself against Loki. “Fuck! I want… I want  _ everything _ all at once and…” 

“Everything?” 

Tom nodded and kissed Loki frantically. “Everything.” 

“Tell me. Tell me what you want.” 

“I want to suck you, have you suck me. Maybe both at once? Fuck, that sounds amazing. And… and I want you to fuck me. Maybe I could do that to you too? I don’t know. I’ve never…” Loki rolled his hips into Tom, who moaned. “Ohhh God. I’ve never fucked anyone. I want you to show me everything that I need to know to please you. Please?” 

Loki was a sucker for begging, and Tom seemed to realize it. “Beautiful boy, how could I refuse?” He drew Tom into another kiss. “Let’s go upstairs, shall we?” 

Tom nodded, kissed Loki one more time, and raced for the stairs. Loki followed at a more sedate pace. Tom was in his bedroom, standing by the bed, clearly waiting for Loki when he got there. 

Loki looked him up and down as he closed the door. “What do you want first?” 

“I… I’m not sure.” 

Loki strode over and slipped his hands under Tom’s jumper. The boy shivered. “First things first. Clothes off. Yes?” 

Tom nodded. “Yes. I want to see you. I want you to see me. Yes.” 

Loki pulled the thick jumper over the boy’s head, then the tee-shirt he wore below it. Tom was still just as beautiful as he remembered from seeing him shirtless a few days ago. He ran his hands over the smooth golden skin, bathing in the soft noises of pleasure the boy let loose. For a moment, Tom just stood there, head thrown back, shuddering under Loki’s hands. Then he seemed to come back to himself and reached for the buttons on Loki’s shirt. 

“May I?” 

“By all means.” 

Tom smiled and unbuttoned the shirt with swift, sure movements.  _ Not the first time he’s unbuttoned someone else’s shirt. _ Loki’s pale skin was revealed by inches. Once the dark fabric was pulled away, Tom ran his tongue over Loki’s nipples. Loki moaned. 

“You like that?” Tom asked, his mouth against Loki’s skin. 

“Yes, very much so. Do you?” 

“I like doing it, and having it done to me.” 

Loki took the hint and rubbed his thumbs over the boy’s nipples. Tom let out tiny whines and dropped his hands to Loki’s waist. Blue eyes met Loki’s, asking for approval, which Loki gave with a nod. Tom unbuttoned and unzipped Loki’s trousers and shifted them down on his hips. The boy’s focus was wholly on the erection straining at the black fabric of Loki’s boxer briefs. Tom reached out, so slowly, and palmed Loki’s cock. Loki groaned at the contact. 

“Fuck. So sexy.” Tom kissed Loki again while he slipped his hand down between Loki’s trousers and pants. Loki moaned and turned his attention to Tom’s neck. He ran his teeth over the long column, then his tongue. Tom shuddered and shifted until he could grind his cock against Loki’s hip. 

Loki was fairly certain that Tom could come just from rubbing against him, even if they were both clothed. But that wasn’t the plan. 

He stepped back. “Too many clothes. Do you mind?” 

Tom bit his lip and shook his head, but his eyes went wide when Loki dropped to his knees. “What are you…”    
  


Loki leaned in and undid the trouser button with his teeth, and then pulled the zip down the same way. 

“Oh God, you have got to teach me how to do that.” 

Loki hummed and buried his face against Tom’s still trapped cock. Heat radiated through the fabric and Tom gasped as Loki mouthed at him. He smelled wonderful. Clean, musky, and a bit acrid. “You smell amazing.” 

Tom moaned and giggled at the same time. “I…” 

Loki licked along the line where leg met groin, exposed by the line of Tom’s underwear. Tom keened again, stepped back and fell onto the bed. Once he was on his back, he tore the trousers and pants off in one go, taking his socks with them. He looked up at Loki with frantic blue eyes. 

“Someone’s impatient.” Loki didn’t actually mind. He looked the boy over, realizing how silly it was to call him a boy. Loki had been with fully grown men who were less developed. Tom didn’t have much in the way of chest hair - then again, neither did Loki - but he had a thick nest of dark blond curls around his straining cock. He was circumcised, which was a bit odd, but still appealing. Long and a nice girth, not too wide or narrow. Loki’s mouth watered at the sight. He shifted enough to lean forward, planted his elbows on the bed, and sucked Tom down. 

Tom cried out, his back arching off the bed. His hips twitched in an aborted thrust, but he controlled himself well. “Oh God! Please, oh God…” 

Loki hummed and licked the bottom of the boy’s cock from root to tip, then suckled at the head. The sensitive spot at the base of the head was easier to lick than if he’d been uncut, so Loki flirted his tongue over that spot while Tom whined. 

Loki looked up to see Tom staring at him, mouth open. Loki smiled around the cock in his mouth and sunk down again. 

“Oh my God, how can you even…” 

Loki swallowed around the head of the cock in his throat and Tom moaned. “Oh fuck, you have  _ got _ to teach me that… oh fuck…” 

Loki chuckled and Tom keened again. The boy reached down, towards Loki’s head, then snatched his hand back. Someone had taught the boy  _ some _ blowjob etiquette. Still, Tom’s hips trembled, and he started to taste more and more acrid. This wasn’t going to take long. 

Loki sped up the pace, and palmed the boy’s balls. Tom seemed to lose all coherence, moaning Loki’s name over and over again while he tried not to thrust. His hands balled up in the duvet, and a high keen escaped his lips. Loki pressed his thumb against Tom’s perineum and sucked hard. 

“I’m… I… gonna cc…” 

Loki sped up just a bit more and Tom screamed as he came. Loki watched his face as the boy’s mouth dropped open and his eyes rolled back in his head. Damn that was sexy. Tom lost himself in the orgasm so completely. Loki swallowed down his bitter release almost as an afterthought. 

Tom lay panting, eyes closed, as Loki got to his feet and stripped off his trousers. He left the boxer briefs on, but removed his socks, since there was little sillier than a man in socks and nothing else. He lay at his nephew’s side and brushed his hand through Tom’s curls as he came down. 

After a minute or so, Tom opened his eyes and smiled up at Loki. “That was amazing.” 

Loki grinned. “Good.” 

“Can you teach me to not gag like that?” 

“It’s a matter of practice more than anything else, but certainly.” 

Tom’s eyes flicked up and down Loki’s torso. “May I try?” 

“Now?” 

“Unless you had something else in mind?” 

“We have options.” Loki placed a closed-mouthed kiss on Tom’s lips. “It’s up to you.” 

Tom licked his way into Loki’s mouth. He didn’t seem to mind the taste of his own release, instead moaning and moving closer. “I’ll need a few minutes to go again, but I’m happy to do something else.” 

Loki refrained from rolling his eyes at ‘a few minutes’. “The way I see it, we have three options at the moment. Well, four. I can take care of myself, you can try out some kind of reciprocation, we can stop altogether, or I can fuck you.” 

Tom’s breath caught. “Which of those do you want?” 

“I would be fine with any of them.” 

“Don’t lie, I know you don’t want to stop.” 

“No, I don’t, but I would be  _ fine _ with it. It’s always alright to stop.”

“Oh.” Tom fell silent. “I want to suck you.” 

Loki shuddered. “I will never say no to that.” 

Tom smiled and drew his attention down. “Lay on the bed the other way?” 

Loki shifted until he lay on the bed normally rather than at a right angle. It was a full size bed, which was a bit unusual for a teenager, but the room was big enough to accommodate it. Tom hovered over him for a moment, then pulled down Loki’s boxer briefs. His eyes went very wide when he saw Loki’s cock. 

“You’re… big.” 

“No bigger than you.” 

“I suppose not. I’m just used to being the biggest guy in the room. In more ways than one.” 

Loki laughed and smiled down at Tom. “You probably will be in most cases.” 

Tom returned the smile with a nervous one of his own. “That’s good to know, I guess.” 

Loki held out a hand. “Come up here.” 

Tom blinked at him and obeyed. Loki pulled the boy down so that his head was nestled on Loki’s shoulder. “Even if we move forward with the idea that we will still be together in a few years, I want you to know what to do in any situation. I fully expect you to go back to school and find a boyfriend there. And when you go to university, do the same. Hell, even experiment with girls while you’re at it if you want. If you still want this, I’m here, but I do not assume monogamy from you. That’s why I’m telling you what to expect from other people. I’m not teaching you these things so that you’re a better lover for  _ me, _ but so that you’re a better, more experienced lover in general.” 

Tom shook his head and buried his face against Loki’s neck and shoulder. “I don’t want that. I want to be with you, not somebody else. Isn’t that how this is supposed to work?” 

“I think you do want other people, darling boy. We’ve already broken so many taboos, what’s one more?” 

“I… Maybe. Can we talk about this later?” 

“Of course.” Loki kissed the top of Tom’s head. “Do you want to stop?” 

“No.” He sat up and kissed Loki’s cheek, then shifted so that he sat over Loki’s hips. “No, I want to make you come. Tell me what to do?” 

Loki studied the determined look in his nephew’s eyes. “I’ll give you lots of feedback, but I’m certain you have a better idea of what to do than you give yourself credit for.” 

“Okay.” Tom sounded doubtful, but he scooted down on the bed so that he lay between Loki’s legs, Loki’s cock in front of his nose. “I’ve found that this is more comfortable than kneeling.” 

Loki raised an eyebrow. “How many times have you done this?” 

“I… about a dozen times, I think? More than ten, less than fifteen.” 

“Eton has clearly gone mad since I was there if they’re letting you get up to things like that.” 

Tom chuckled, gently gripped the base of Loki’s cock, and dove in. 

Loki’s eyes fluttered and he arched his back. It had been a long time since someone had gone down on him, and although Tom lacked finesse, there was something to be said for enthusiasm. He’d also clearly picked up some of what Loki had done to him. 

“Mmmm. Very nice. Slow down a little?” 

The frantic pace slowed. “Mmm?” 

“Yes, that’s… ahhh… yes. You’ll wear yourself out if you go too quickly.” 

“Mmhmm?” 

“A good blowjob should last for as long as you can make it last. Sometimes that’s almost no time at all, but pacing yourself is good.” 

“MMMmmm.” 

Loki shivered and moaned. 

“M?” 

“Vibration. Feels very nice.” 

Tom hummed around Loki’s cock for a full breath. 

“Yes, like that.” 

It was difficult to give instructions beyond “yes, like that” and “faster” or “slower” but Loki was doing his best to be a good teacher. “Let the texture of your tongue do some of the work. Perfect.” 

Tom had a tendency to try and take more than he could, and choke on Loki’s cock. “Slow down, sweetheart. Some people care for that, but I do not.” 

Tom pulled away gasping. “Care for what?” He massaged his jaw with long fingers. 

“Choking on it. Unless you get off on it, don’t offer.”    
  
Tom frowned and stretched his mouth open as far as it would go before massaging his cheeks again. “What do you mean?” 

Loki sighed. “Some people want you to fuck their face when they’re giving head. They want to be used. Some people want you to choke on their cock, to make it seem like they’re overwhelming you or hurting you, or to  _ actually _ hurt you. I’m not going to criticize any of that, but unless you want it too, don’t offer. The same goes for pulling hair, or holding your head against your will.” Loki ran a hand through Tom’s golden curls. “Some might do it out of ignorance, but don’t allow yourself to be used unless you  _ want _ to be used. Does that make sense?” 

“I suppose so… I don’t particularly like choking.” 

“I don’t like it either, in either direction. I don’t care for the sound of you being in any distress.” 

“But I want to take all of you.” 

Loki shuddered. “We’ll work on your gag reflex, that will help. There’s a way to open your throat that I’ll show you later. For the moment, just take as much as you’re comfortable with.” He swept a hand down Tom’s cheek and the boy nuzzled into it. “Is your jaw better?” 

“Yes.” 

“Take breaks if it gets too painful. Holding your mouth open for so long can be a real strain. Just use your hands for a bit while you rest. Like any exercise, that will get easier the more you do it.” 

Some of the tension fell from Tom’s shoulders and he took Loki’s cock into his mouth again. This time he used all of the tricks Loki had shown him. It didn’t take long for him to find a rhythm this time, and Loki found himself groaning helplessly after a few minutes. Now it was impossible to give good, constructive feedback. 

Loki tossed his head and gripped the sheets while he tried not to thrust. “So good. Again? Yessss. Ah!” 

Tom moaned around Loki’s cock and started rubbing himself against the blankets. 

“Just a little faster? Yes. Ooooh. Do that again.” Loki lost himself in the hot wet mouth around his cock. Tom’s motions became frantic. Loki was fairly certain that the boy was wanking, even as he sucked Loki’s cock. For some reason that was incomprehensibly sexy. “Are you going to come too, sweet boy?” 

“Mmmmhmmmm… Mmm!” 

“Oh God, yes…. Aaahhhh. I’m about to come…” 

“Mmmmmmm.” 

Tom didn’t move away, he just kept bobbing his head up and down Loki’s cock with a wet, tight friction that drove him mad. Loki’s hips jerk and he gasped out a cry as he came. 

Tom convulsed at the bottom of the bed. He gave a muffled scream, then pulled away. He coughed, shivered, and dropped flat onto the bed. Loki wasn’t in much better shape. He stared at the ceiling, wondering if he should feel guilty. On one hand, he came down the throat of a fifteen year old. On the other, he was giving valuable lessons on consent and technique. Lessons that Loki wished he’d gotten earlier in his life. One thing he did regret was the distance between them right now. 

“Alright down there?” 

“Yup.” 

“Do you have the energy to come back up here?” 

The bed shifted and Loki looked up to see Tom crawling to him. The crawl was artless, but incredibly sexy. Loki’s breath caught at the sight. He grinned and held out a hand. Tom smiled like an angel and took the proffered hand. Loki tugged him the last few inches into a kiss. The boy draped himself against Loki’s side and melted into the kiss. 

“What was that for?” 

Loki smiled and gave him another small kiss. “For being wonderful.” 

The angel smile grew. “What did I do?” 

“Honestly? You’re just yourself.” 

“Oh.” The angel smile simmered down into something incredibly tender. Tom curled against Loki’s side again. “Thanks.” 

“Of course.” Loki kissed his forehead. “I’m sure you still have enough in you to go for another round, but this old man needs a bit of a break.” 

“Mmmkay.” Tom settled himself closer to Loki. “This is nice too.” 

“Yes, it is.” 


	5. Chapter 5

Loki may have fallen asleep, or he may have just drifted away from himself for a while. He was vaguely aware of Tom getting up and returning a short while later. Again, he didn’t know how much time had passed, but Loki opened his eyes to see Tom sitting next him and watching him closely. 

“Do I have something on my face?” 

Tom giggled and shook his head. “No. I was just… memorizing you.” 

Loki raised an eyebrow. “Oh?” 

“No matter what happens with us, I have to go back to school, and you have to go back to your regular life. I want to remember this.” Tom looked him up and down in a hungry way. “I’m trying to burn the image of you naked in my bed into my brain so I never lose it.” The boy blushed. “Sorry, that sounded a bit stalker-y.” 

“Perhaps a bit, but your passion does you credit, not shame.” Loki smiled. “Just don’t lock me up in the cellar as your personal sex slave, and I think we’ll be fine.” 

Tom giggled. “I think someone would notice.” 

“That seems likely. I suppose you could always claim that you were talking to yourself.” 

“I don’t sound  _ that _ much like you.” 

Loki shrugged. “Ask your father about that. Besides, aren’t you supposed to be good at voices and accents? Mine should be effortless.” 

“Well yes, but…” Tom trailed off. “Do you  _ want _ me to lock you in the cellar?” 

“No lovely boy, I prefer the opposite end of that particular spectrum, but it was an amusing image.” 

Tom’s eyebrows went up at: ‘opposite end of the spectrum’ but he didn’t comment on it. “I kind of like the idea too, but I think we have enough legal issues to not add kidnapping into the mix.” 

Loki laughed and reached for Tom, who dove into his arms. Loki kissed his temple. “It might be the first time in history that a child kidnapped his uncle rather than the other way around.” 

Tom snickered and snuggled into Loki's side. “Something like that probably happened during the War of the Roses, or something, but almost certainly not for sexual purposes.” 

“Probably not.” Loki ran his fingers through Tom’s hair, catching individual curls and allowing them to spring back. “I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to have a conversation with someone where  _ they’re _ the ones bringing up random historical events.” 

“I thought you dated clever people?” 

“Stephen was not interested in history. He was brilliant, but found anything outside of his area borning at best.” 

Tom made a face. “He sounds terrible.” 

“I won’t argue with that.” 

Tom squeezed against Loki’s side, but didn’t comment further. Loki continued to run his fingers through Tom’s hair. Letting the curls spring back from his fingers was strangely satisfying. Silence continued, but it didn’t feel awkward, just peaceful. 

After a few quiet moments, Tom began brushing his fingers along Loki’s chest. It was nice, not demanding or even terribly sexual. Loki gave an approving hum and placed a kiss to the top of Tom’s head. The boy pressed himself closer, and it became crystal clear that Tom at least perceived this as sexual. 

“Did you want something?” Loki asked as the boy rocked his half-hard cock into Loki’s hip. 

“Maybe.” 

Loki ran his hand down Tom’s back to less than subtly grope his arse. Tom gasped and ground himself against Loki. 

“Okay, yes, I want something.” 

Loki kissed Tom’s forehead and muttered against his skin. “What did you have in mind?” 

“I… anything, really.” 

Loki twisted around so he could look Tom in the eyes. “I shall never judge you for voicing your desires. It’s incredibly sexy to hear what you want of me.” 

Tom blushed. “It seems weird.” 

Loki chuckled and pulled their hips together. “Well I find it sexy.” 

Tom shivered as their cocks brushed. “I believe you.” 

Loki grinned and kissed him. Tom moaned into his mouth, ran his hands down to Loki’s bum and squeezed. “Now, I believe you said you had some fantasies to fulfill? We could work on those.” 

Tom nodded and kissed Loki frantically. “Yes, okay, yes. Oh…” He shuddered as Loki trailed a finger along the crack of his arse. “I… I keep having this fantasy where you come into the bath while I’m showering.” 

“How rude of me,” Loki muttered. He trailed kisses down Tom’s neck until he reached the boy’s shoulder. “Go on.” 

“I… ahhh… Sometimes I would already be wanking in there, sometimes you would watch me shower for a while.”    
  
Loki scraped his teeth along the point where neck and shoulder met. “Which do you prefer?” 

“I like both, but… ngh, how are you so good at that?” Tom shuddered under Loki’s mouth. “When I’m already wanking, that’s better.” 

Loki chuckled. “That’s even more rude of me.” He paused, listening as Tom’s breath got more ragged. “Go on.” 

“I would be taking my time, then… ah… Then I’d notice you were there.” 

Loki smiled. He could imagine the scene very well. The boy’s curls flattened to his scalp by the water, one hand braced against the shower wall, the other slowly stroking his cock. Lubricated by soap or conditioner or something. “Lay on your side for me?” 

Tom blinked at him, then complied. Loki curled around his back, cock pressed to Tom’s arse. He shuddered in Loki’s arms as he took Tom’s hand and guided it to the boy’s cock. “Show me?” 

“Oh God.” Tom shuddered and began a slow, sensual movement. 

Loki kept his hand over Tom’s as the boy obeyed. “Keep talking. You just noticed I was there.” 

“Y..yes. I would look up and see you, and you would give me that smile. The one that turns my insides into water. I’d stop, of course. And you would say. ‘It’s alright, don’t stop on my account.’” 

Loki marveled at the slight change in Tom’s voice for “Loki’s” lines. Just a bit deeper, voice slightly more clipped. “That  _ is _ what I’d say.” 

“Good. Oh God, I… I’d start again and you would come closer to watch me through the shower curtain.” 

Loki pictured that too. The boy’s face red from the heat and embarrassment, but so turned on he couldn’t stop. “Just watch you?” 

“For a while, yes. You’d tell me to slow down when I started going faster, but otherwise watch. But then, then…” Tom gasped and sped up his hand a bit. Loki slowed him down again with his own hand. Tom whined. “Then you’d take your clothes off while you watched me. You’d be hard, of course, and you… you would wank while you watched me.” 

Loki rocked against Tom’s arse, not willing to move away to touch himself to go along with the boy’s fantasy. “Would I ever touch you?” 

Tom’s breath hitched. “Sometimes. Sometimes we’d both come with the curtain between us, looking at each other. Other times you would climb in with me, so we’d both be all wet.” Tom’s hand sped up again. Loki didn’t stop him this time. “I can picture the way the water pours over you. Your hair soaking, down your back. I’d lick the water off your chest. Then I’d suck your cock and I’d come when you did, since I’d keep wanking on my knees. Or…” Tom moaned. It was a quiet thing, unlike his usual noises. “Or you would stand behind me, like you are now, and you’d fuck me, while I fucked your hand.” 

“I like that idea very much.” Loki slid their joined hands a little faster. “I’d open you up and take you in the shower. All wet and slippery, squirming in my arms. On my cock.” 

“God, yes, yes.” Tom was panting now, his hips moving almost as much as his hand. “Coming in your arms, with you inside of me, God, that’s all I want…” He twisted, squirming against Loki, almost as though he was trying to impale himself on Loki’s cock. “Please. Please pleasepleaseplease!” The pleading merged into a near-silent cry as Tom jerked in his arms. Loki felt the glide of their hands smooth out, lubricated by Tom’s cum. He wasn’t that close himself, but Loki shuddered in sympathy. He rocked slowly against the boy’s bum, just enjoying the feel of a warm body in his arms. 

He listened to Tom’s gasping breaths as he came down. It dawned on Loki that the reason the sounds Tom had made were different now was that he was used to coming silently when someone might be around to hear him. It was just the knowledge that they were properly alone that allowed the boy to let his voice free before. He must be so inside his own head, reliving the fantasy, that he reacted to it as though he had to keep quiet. 

Loki wiped his hand on the sheets, then brushed his fingers through Tom’s hair while Loki waited for him to come back to himself. Loki’s own arousal sat calmly, with little urgency. He would happily continue, but he would also happily wait for his young partner to rebound. Or not. 

Tom stirred a moment later, pressing his back against Loki’s front. “I’m going to need to change the sheets.” 

Loki chuckled. “That can wait until later. I suspect that we’ll just dirty them again quickly enough.” 

“God, I hope so.” 

“We could always go fuck in the shower.” 

Tom appeared to think about this for a moment. He turned in Loki’s arms to face him. “I do want you to… to fuck me at some point, but I… I think I need a little more time.” 

Loki smiled and brushed his fingers over the boy’s cheek. “Of course. Take all the time you need for that. We can work our way up to it.” 

Tom’s eyes went very wide at that. “How?” 

Loki held up a hand. “Fingers, darling boy. That’s how you prep, and it can be very pleasurable.” 

“Oh…” Tom stared at Loki’s fingers. Loki had always been proud of his hands. His fingers were long and thin without being skinny. He had excellent control, with seemingly effortless elegance. Tom’s stare turned into a frown and he held up his own hand. He placed his palm against Loki’s. 

Their hands were the exact same size. Not just the same length, but their palms and fingers were the same width. Everything lined up perfectly. 

Loki blinked. “Well, that’s a bit odd.” 

Tom shifted his gaze down, clearly comparing their cocks. He relaxed just a bit. 

“You were worried that we would look the same there too?” 

Tom nodded. “I mean, that would be weird.” 

“And the rest of this isn’t?” Loki swept in and kissed him again. “I will say that unless I very much miss my guess, your cock is the same size as mine, and the difference is primarily because I was never circumcised and you were. We are very similar, you and I. If that’s too strange for you, that’s fine, but it will be a factor our whole lives. Even if we were to go someplace where nobody knew us, anyone could look at us and see we’re related. It isn’t unreasonable to think that I’m your father just based on appearance.” 

Tom shook his head. “Brother, maybe, but you don’t look like you’re old enough to be my dad.” 

Loki sighed. “But I am. I was eighteen when you were born. That would be young, yes, but teenagers become parents all the time.” 

“But not you.”    
  


“No, not me.” Loki took Tom’s hand in his own. “If this is too much for you, that’s fine. I will never pressure you into anything, so please think about this. There is a chance that we’ll look even more similar as you get older. I hadn’t come into by full height at fifteen, and neither had Thor.” 

Tom nodded and looked up at the ceiling for a long moment. “This seems… right. Somehow natural, as strange as that sounds. Weird, but right.” He looked back at Loki. “Does that make sense?” 

Loki nodded. “It does. I feel the same way. As though this was inevitable.” 

Tom frowned at him. “But you didn’t want it at the beginning.” 

“No, I wanted it but thought -  _ knew _ \- I shouldn’t act on that wanting. I was trying to be a responsible adult, not a pervy uncle.” Tom giggled, which is what Loki had intended so he smiled. “I meant what I said earlier.” 

“Which bit?” 

“The bit where I told you I expect you to sleep with other people.” 

“I…” Tom wrapped himself around Loki’s chest. “I don’t want to.” 

“I certainly won’t force you to, but it would be better if you did.” 

“Why?” 

“There are a few reasons. You told me that you’ve wanted this for a year and a half, yes?” 

“Since we spent the summer together, yes.” 

“And I’m willing to wager that most of the experience you’ve had was  _ after _ that, yes?” 

Tom nodded. “I was curious, and I needed to know  _ something _ in order to convince you to sleep with me.” 

Loki silently marveled at the boy’s determination. “Please tell me I didn’t do anything that encouraged you when you were barely fourteen?” 

“No. Nothing inappropriate. You let me sleep leaning against you and I saw you in your bathing shorts a lot. And you answered by questions about sex. That was it.” 

Loki relaxed a bit. “Good. I’m afraid I only saw you as myself at that same age. I had no intention of…” Words failed Loki here. 

“I believe that ‘grooming’ is the word you’re looking for,” Tom said quietly. 

Loki made a face. “Urgh, yes. How do you know that?”    
  


“Internet.” Came the flat reply. 

“Nobody’s done that to you, have they?” 

Tom shook his head and snuggled closer. “It happened to one of the boys at school. A year below me. His step-dad. It… it wasn’t good.” 

On one hand, it was a positive that Tom knew exactly what an abusive version of this kind of relationship might look like, but it still worried Loki. “And you’re still certain that this is what you want?”

“Yes. He was a mess. He couldn’t even…” Tom trailed off, then looked up at Loki. “He was forced into it, though he didn’t realize it at the time. He was… too young. But you and me, that’s different. I know this is fucked up on one level, but it  _ is _ what I want. You’ve never forced me into anything.” 

“But you understand why I want you to have something of a normal young adulthood, yes? Why I think you should try and see other people?” 

“I suppose so. Alright, I won’t dump my school boyfriend, then.” 

Loki let out a burst of laughter. “You cheated on your boyfriend with me?” 

Tom shook his head and gave Loki a small smile. “We’re not exclusive. He has a girlfriend at home and knew I had someone too.” 

“I assume you didn’t say who?” 

“Do I look mental to you? Of course not. He knows that it’s another guy, that’s it.” 

Loki smiled. Maybe there was hope for the younger generation yet. 

“What are the other reasons?” Tom asked. 

“Well, we won’t be able to see one another often, and will have to hide what we’re doing when we do. We can spend holidays together, but not all of them. It’s just been a fluke that we’ve gotten so much time alone together. And  _ you _ have the sex drive of a teenage boy.” 

Tom smiled and gave Loki a little kiss, then whispered against his lips. “I can just keep wanking to fantasies of you like I’ve done for the last year and a half. Only they’ll be better now since I actually know what it’s like.” 

Loki shuddered and licked his lips. “You don’t say?” 

“Mmhmm.” He shifted so that he was more on top of Loki rather than next to him. Dear God, the boy was hard,  _ again? _ “When first you got here, and came upstairs to get me? That’s why I didn’t come down right away.” 

Loki opened his mouth, but Tom kissed him before he could say anything. “You touched me for the first time in ages, and I got hard like  _ that.” _ Tom clicked his fingers. “We hugged and all I could think about was you fucking me.” 

“You were downstairs in five minutes.” 

Tom ground his cock against Loki’s hip. “It doesn’t take long.” 

Loki shuddered again. “And this is another reason.” 

Tom traced his fingers over Loki’s chest. “Oh?” 

“I am an old man and cannot possibly keep up with you.” 

A gentle hand swept over Loki’s cock, which was doing its best to rally after the more uncomfortable parts of the conversation. “You seem to be doing fine to me.” Tom pressed closer and kissed Loki again. “I want you to do it. I want you to fuck me.” 

Loki bit his lower lip as an image of the boy’s perfect, muscular arse popped into his mind. “You’re completely certain of that? You wanted to wait just a few minutes ago.” 

“That was then.” Another kiss. “Show me? Use your fingers on me if nothing else.” 

Loki moaned. “You will be the death of me. You have lube?” 

Tom nodded and rummaged in the drawer of his nightstand. He pressed the tube into Loki’s hand. “The chemist gave me a funny look, but didn’t question my buying it.” 

“You are determined.” 

Tom rolled onto his back and smiled up at Loki. “I learned from the best.” 

Loki lay to Tom’s left side, just below his shoulder so he could see Tom’s face, but reach his arse and cock easily. “Have you done this at all?” He spread some of the lube over his fingers and traced along Tom’s bum. 

“A little bit, not much.” He shivered and spread his legs to Loki’s questing hand. “Not with anyone else. Just… ah! Just by myself.” 

Loki rubbed small circles over the boy’s tight hole. He could tell that Tom hadn’t done this much, at least not recently. “You’ve never put anything there other than your fingers?” 

He shook his head. “I was - ahhhhh - worried that I’d accidentally do something wrong. That I’d... oh fuck… I’d hurt myself.” 

“That’s probably wise.” Loki slipped the tip of his finger inside and Tom moaned. He was gloriously tight. “Relax. Just breathe. Let me know if it’s too much, alright?” 

“It’s not. It feels amazing, just strange.” 

“Good.” Loki leaned in and kissed Tom’s lips. It took the boy a moment to respond, but he tangled his tongue eagerly enough with Loki’s. While they kissed, Loki sunk his finger deeper and deeper into his young lover, until Tom was moaning into his mouth. Loki pulled away so he could see the boy’s expression. Tom’s eyes fluttered and his mouth hung open. He breathed with every stroke of Loki’s finger. “Good?” 

“Yes.” Tom squirmed, apparently trying to draw Loki in. ”Is there more?” 

“Greedy thing. Yes, there’s more.” Loki withdrew his finger and coated it and its neighbor with more lube. It might be too much, but better too much than not enough. “Deep breath, now let it out.” On Tom’s exhale, Loki slipped both fingers in. 

“Ooooh.” Tom gave a full body shiver and opened his eyes. Loki could barely see the color of his irises. “Fuck, that’s good.” He arched his back and pressed down towards Loki’s hand. “How is that so good?” 

“I haven’t even gotten to the best part.” 

“No?” 

Loki twisted his fingers in deep, searching for exactly the right angle, then curled. 

“AAAHHH!” Tom sat up, nearly crushing Loki’s hand in the process, before laying back down again. “Sorry! Sorry. Oh God!” Loki repeated the motion and Tom shuddered. “What did you do?” 

“Mmmm, that is your prostate, dear boy.” He pressed down with his thumb on the outside and curled his fingers within. Tom shook again, moaning long and loud. He thrust up into the air, cock leaking, begging for attention. “Some people can come just from prostate stimulation alone.” 

“Fffffuck…” Tom’s eyes rolled back in his head and he gripped the sheets under his hands. “Ccccan you?” 

“I haven’t, but I prefer to top as a general rule.” Loki started to scissor his fingers, properly stretching now. “Is this still alright?” 

Tom nodded. “Feels nice. Like yoga.” 

Loki frowned, wondering what he meant for a moment. “A good stretch?” 

“Mmmmhmmm.” Tom appeared to be melting into a comfortable puddle on the bed, except for his cock, which strained towards his stomach. “More?” 

“You’re certain?” 

“Yes please.” 

More lube was applied and Loki slid three fingers in. Tom’s whole body undulated along the bed, like a ripple. He pushed himself firmly onto Loki’s fingers, clearly trying to fuck himself. “More?” 

“God, you’re sure you’ve never done this before?” 

Tom shook his head. “Nope, feels soooo good though. Gonna try this again.” 

Loki bit his lip. “By yourself?” 

“Yup.” Tom shifted so that he could fuck Loki’s fingers. “Not letting anyone but you do this.” 

“Don’t make that decision quite yet.” 

“Fine.” He squirmed until Loki’s middle finger brushed his prostate again. “Oooh fuck! Need more! Please?” 

Loki debated adding one more finger, but he was aching by now and Tom was well stretched out. He could tell how far gone Tom was by how short his sentences became. It was heady to turn an articulate, intelligent young man into a writhing, moaning,  _ pleading _ mess with just his fingers. 

“Give me one moment, lovely boy, I’ll be right back.” Loki kissed Tom before getting to his feet. He dodged into his room across the way, washed his hands as quickly as he could, snagged a condom from his suitcase, and came back. Tom had one hand on his cock, and the other up his own arse, clearly feeling around. 

“I was gone for less than a minute!” Loki exclaimed, though he wasn’t upset. How could he be with all that gorgeous, sexy teenager on the bed waiting for him? 

Tom grinned up at him, completely unrepentant. “Should have planned better.” 

Loki growled and leaned over Tom, cadging him with his arms and legs. “Cheeky. Just for that, I’m not going to show you how to put a condom on with your mouth.” 

Tom blinked up at him. “You can do that?” 

“I can do that.” He sat back, ripped the condom packet open with one hand and his teeth while the other hand batted Tom’s away from his own arse. “You know how to put a condom on the regular way, I hope?” 

“‘Course.” 

“Prove it.” Loki handed over the latex round. 

Tom examined the condom for a moment, clearly making sure he had it the right way round -  _ thank God, he knows what he’s doing _ \- then looked back at Loki. “On you?” 

“On me. Never let anyone fuck you bareback unless you know for a fact that they’re clean. And by ‘know for a fact’, I mean you’ve seen the test results yourself, and know they haven’t been with anyone else since. Understood?” 

Tom nodded, checked that he had the right direction on the condom again, and rolled it down Loki’s cock. Loki did his best to hold still, but he still moaned at the contact. 

“Now?” Tom lay back looking expectant. 

“More lube, then yes.” Loki reached for the lube again, but Tom snatched it up. He poured some directly onto Loki’s cock before massaging it on, coating the condom. Loki’s head dropped back and he groaned. He looked back down at Tom a moment later. His mouth was open, panting as he watched Loki’s reactions. The pure lust in his expression was enthralling. Loki added just a bit more lube and leaned forward again. “Do you want to be on your back?” 

Tom nodded. “At least at first. I may want to ride you later.” 

Loki shuddered. “Whatever you’d like. They both sound wonderful.” 

“Is there a difference?” 

“Whoever is on top has more control and does more of the work.” 

Tom got a sly look. “Maybe I should be on top then, and give you a rest.” 

Loki narrowed his eyes. “Maybe I should just take you over the edge of the bed so you can’t see what’s happening at all.” 

“Won’t your knees get sore, old man?” 

Loki growled and dove down to devour the boy’s mouth. Tom laughed and returned the kiss just as enthusiastically. He buried his fingers in Loki’s hair, disarranging it so it fell around both their faces in a black waterfall. Somewhere in the midst of the kisses, Tom wrapped his legs around Loki’s waist and tried to pull him down. 

“Impatient.” 

“I’ve been waiting for this for a year and a half. Yes, I’m impatient.” 

“Good things come to those who wait.” 

“Fuck the platitudes. Or better yet, fuck me.” 

Loki chuckled. “Clever boy.” He rolled them over so that Tom was on top of him, straddling his waist. “Let’s see what you make of this.” 

“I…” Tom’s eyes went a little wide. “What do I do?” 

“Hold the base of my cock to keep it steady. You’ll be able to aim better that way. You should be able to feel when things are lined up correctly.” 

Tom nodded and followed Loki’s instructions. Loki watched his face for any sign of discomfort. It might be easier for Loki to take care of this part, but he was trying to teach the boy. It also eased a touch of guilt. Loki was well aware that this was a major thing for Tom. If there was such a thing as virginity in this context, it would be well gone for his young nephew when this was over. This way, Tom made an offering of his virginity rather than Loki taking it. 

He felt the breach as it happened. Loki kept himself still as possible, biting his lip to help focus. There was enough lube to make the glide fairly easy, but Loki’s cock was certainly bigger than three fingers. Tom had a small frown, but didn’t appear to be in pain. 

“Breathe. Remember what you did when I was fingering you. Relax.” 

Tom nodded, took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. He slid down an inch onto Loki’s cock in one smooth motion. They both moaned. Dear God the boy had amazing muscle control. “Good?” 

Tom slid down another inch and moaned. “Yes. Very good.” He tilted his head back, exposing the long column of his throat. Loki wanted to bite it, but was enjoying the view too much to be bothered to move. Tom hitched himself up then sank down the rest of the way. “Fuuuuck.” 

“Agreed.” Loki shifted his hips a bit to change the angle. “You’re so tight. God.” 

“Is that good?” 

“Amazing.” Loki reached up to pull Tom down into a kiss. “You’re perfect.” 

Tom smiled, sweetly, like sunshine. “So are you.” 

“I’d argue, but I’ve learned to never contradict a man who has a hold on my cock.” 

Tom laughed and kissed him again before shifting back. “Let’s see…” He lifted his hips, then slid back down again. “Mmm…” He tried again, at a different angle this time. Soon Tom found an angle and a rhythm that he liked, and rode Loki’s cock with abandon. 

Loki was very glad that he’d already come today, otherwise this would have been over far too quickly. Tom was so tight, and he made the most wonderful sounds as he fucked himself on Loki’s cock. Loki ran his hands up and down the boy’s legs, swept his thumbs over the hollows of his hips. He avoided touching Tom’s cock, as the boy did himself. Loki suspected that he was trying to make himself come just by prostate stimulation alone. It might or might not work, but it was a lovely experiment. Loki moaned as much from the sight of the beautiful boy on his lap as the tight heat around his cock. 

“Oh God, why is this… oh fuck, so good. Wanted… so long… better though… ohhhhhh.” Tom leaned forward so that he could kiss Loki. “You feel sooooo good. No… no idea…” He attacked the side of Loki’s neck, teeth sliding against his skin. “Is good?” 

“Yes. Dear God, yes.” Loki pulled him into another kiss. “You’re lovely and perfect and feel so good around me. Yes.” Another frantic kiss. “Are you getting close?” 

Tom moved again, tilting his hips, and let out a high keen of pleasure. “Yes yes yes…” 

  
Loki let his own hips free and started to fuck up into that perfect arse. Tom cried out, and started moving faster. Loki felt his own orgasm building, far faster than usual, pushing up from deep inside of him. But he would absolutely  _ not _ come first. That was terrible etiquette and not what he wanted for this lovely boy’s first time. He wrapped a hand around Tom’s cock and squeezed. Tom screamed and fucked Loki’s hand for a few strokes before throwing his head back and howling as he came. Loki had been so close already that the sight of Tom coming was enough to push him over. He shouted something that might have been profanity or a name, or the invocation of some ancient god, and the world melted around him. 


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning, Loki found himself alone in Tom’s bedroom when he woke. For a few, panicked moments, he thought something might be wrong. That Tom had changed his mind about what they were doing and had left the house, or phoned the police. Or worse, phoned his parents. However, the spot next to him was still warm and now that he thought about it, Loki could hear water running nearby. 

He dragged himself out of the bed - which really wasn’t big enough for two tall men to sleep in - and stretched. Loki stuck his head out into the hallway and saw that the bathroom door was open, steam billowing out into the corridor. 

Loki grinned to himself and dodged into the guest room across the hall. He took advantage of the ensuite, snagged a condom out of his bag, and went into the steamy bathroom. 

Tom was clearly visible through the mostly-transparent shower curtain. He was rinsing shampoo out of his hair, eyes closed. Loki admired the way that the suds trailed down his chest and back. The misty pattern of the curtain blocked lower than that, so he wasn’t able to see the foam coat his lover’s arse and cock, but he could imagine it. 

“Did you know that leaving the door to bath open after you’ve spent the night with someone is a universal invitation to come shower with that person?” 

Tom started at Loki’s voice, rinsed the soap off his face and looked over at him. “I didn’t know that, actually, but I’m glad you took the invitation.” 

Loki smiled and walked up to the curtain. Tom was a little taller than him at the moment, since the tub was higher than the floor. This close, he had a much better view and stole a look past the more opaque section of the curtain. Tom was visibly moving towards full hardness, just based on Loki’s presence and whatever was going on in his head. Loki looked back up to meet his eyes. Tom was flushed, lower lip caught between his teeth. 

“Like what you see?” 

Loki grinned. “Always.” 

“I’m afraid I wasn’t actually having a wank in here.” 

“There are permutations of the fantasy, aren’t there?” 

“There are.” Tom’s eyes travelled hungrily over Loki standing nude in the bath. “But this is better than any of them.” 

“What would have of me, then? Shall I stand out here and watch you?” Loki waved a hand towards him, then let his eyes follow the shower’s spray over his skin. “I rather fancy the way that the water flows over you. And the soap. What would you use, if you were going to rub one off in here?” 

“Oh God.” Tom’s eyes darted around the space. “Body wash, usually. It… it lasts for a while.” 

Loki raised an eyebrow. “Well?” 

“I…” Tom picked up the bottle of body wash and poured some of it into his hand. Rather than applying it to his cock, as Loki expected, he stood there looking at it for a long moment. “Loki? Would you come in here instead?” 

“Of course.” Loki complied, sliding the curtain back behind him. “Is there anything wrong?” 

Tom shook his head and rubbed his hands together to foam the soap. “I wanted to touch you, that’s all. Come get yourself wet, okay?” 

Loki reached out and tipped Tom’s face up to kiss him. Tom gasped into his mouth and deepened the kiss. After a moment Loki pulled away to breathe. “Never be afraid to ask for what you want. As I said,” his gaze dropped meaningfully to his own rapidly hardening cock, “I find it very sexy.” 

Tom nodded and steered Loki around him and under the water. Loki had to admit, Jane’s sensibilities when it came to plumbing were top notch. All of the baths in this house were huge, luxurious, and tall enough for Thor, even the guest ensuite. Hot water cascaded over Loki, soaking his hair and skin. A moment later, he felt soapy hands on his back. Tom rubbed small circles along Loki’s spine outwards, hands slippery and gliding with the water. It felt like a massage, and his muscles lost what little tension they had. 

Tom moved up and down his back, getting lower with each pass until he was massaging the muscles of Loki’s arse, soapy finger trailing along the crack. Loki shivered and braced his hands against the wall, head hanging. 

“Move your hair, please?” 

When it was wet, Loki’s hair came down to the middle of his back. He pulled the soaked black strands over his shoulder. Tom’s hands came up again, this time gliding over the raven tattoo which had started it all. 

“I do love this tattoo. It’s beautiful.” 

“Thank you.” 

Tom dug his thumbs into the muscle, gliding along the wings. “Is this good?” 

Loki moaned, realizing that he’d been keeping too quiet. “It’s marvelous. Feel free to do this for as long as you’d like.” 

Tom chuckled and ran his hands along Loki’s sides, the down over his hips. He stepped away for a moment, then came back with notably soapier hands. Down Loki’s legs, then up again. 

“Did I need a bath?” 

“No, but I want to give you one.” Tom’s voice was much closer now. “This is a fantasy of mine too.” He slipped his arms around Loki’s torso and pressed his chest to Loki’s back. His cock slipped up against Loki’s arse, rubbing lightly against the groove. “I’ve wanted to feel you wet in my arms since we swam in the pool together, you know?” Tom rubbed wet, soapy hands over Loki’s chest. “I don’t know why, since it was always too cold to… well, no man is impressive in cold water.” 

Loki chuckled. “It is possible to have sex in a swimming pool, but yes.” 

Tom hummed and bit Loki’s shoulder. “Maybe next summer we can try it.” 

“Perhaps.” 

“But in the meantime,” Tom slid wet fingers over Loki’s nipples, “shower sex.” 

Loki moaned as Tom teased his nipples into peaks. “As you say.” 

Tom rocked against Loki’s arse, and slipped his hands down to Loki’s hips. “Do you want to fuck me in here?” 

“I…” Loki trailed off as Tom’s hands got closer and closer to his cock. “I would like to at some point, but this is…” A soapy hand closed around his length and he groaned. “I want this now.” 

“Kay.” Tom’s response was breathy, and he started moving against Loki with more purpose. “I like this too.” 

The soapy hand on his cock felt like heaven and Loki moaned as Tom slicked his hand up and down the shaft, a small twist at the head. This was Tom’s show, and Loki was very, very alright with that. Up and down, hot and wet and slippery. Loki found himself thrusting into Tom’s hand. “Fuck that’s good.” 

“Mmmmm, good.” Tom’s cock slipped along Loki’s arse still, but it wasn’t that controlled. 

“Stop a moment?” 

Tom stopped instantly. “Is something wrong?” 

“No.” Loki turned around and kissed him. “Not at all, I just have a suggestion.” He picked up the body wash and put some onto his own hands, then gave it to Tom, who did the same at Loki’s nod. Once he’d foamed it up to his liking, Loki reached for Tom’s cock and coated it with the suds. Tom moaned and threw his head back. 

“Fuck. But…” 

“Patience.” Loki kissed him one more time, then turned back away from him. “Put your cock between my legs rather than against my arse.” 

“Oh.” Tom obeyed. “Ooooooh.” His head hit between Loki’s shoulder blades. “Oh fuck.” 

“Exactly.” 

Tom flattened himself against Loki’s back and twitched his hips experimentally. His cock brushed against Loki’s balls and premium. They moaned in unison, just one sound since their voices were so similar. Loki braced his hands against the wall again. Tom wrapped one arm around Loki’s chest so he could tease a nipple, and the other hand went around Loki’s cock. 

“Now, fuck me.” 

“Oh God, yes. Okay.” Tom found a rhythm easily now, and started to stroke Loki’s cock in time with his own thrusts. “Fuck this is good.” 

Loki moaned. “Yes, it is.” He squeezed his thighs together, forming a tight channel for Tom to fuck. The boy keened quietly against Loki’s back. 

“Oh God, is this - ah! - is this what it’s like to fuck someone?” 

Loki reached behind him and ran a hand down Tom’s flank. “Similar, yes.” 

“Fuck.” 

“Mmmm.” The feel of Tom’s cock moving against these seldom-stimulated points was exquisite. “This works best… oh… ah… best when the person who’s doing the fucking is shorter. At least if you’re both standing.” 

“Makes sense.” Tom gasped and moaned at the same time. “Fuck… oh fuck you’re so perfect.” 

Loki grinned, though of course Tom couldn’t see it. “Silver tongued flatterer.” 

Tom chuckled and licked Loki’s shoulder. “I wish I could suck suck you off at the same time I’m doing this.” 

That image popped into Loki’s mind, fully formed. Tom on his knees in the shower, perfect pink mouth wrapped around Loki’s cock. Somehow Tom was also still behind him, fucking his thighs. 

“I wish you could too, but I think that would require more of you.” 

“Two isn’t enough?” 

“There’s always room for more,” Loki replied with a chuckle. 

“I’ll… aaaaah… have to look into cloning myself. Or you.” 

“You could have your own personal Loki to keep in the basement.” 

Tom laughed, pausing for a moment. He hugged Loki tightly and kissed his spine. “I thought we agreed, no cellar sex slavery.” 

“Fine.” Loki twitched the muscles in his legs. 

Tom moaned. “Right, fucking.” One hand slid up Loki’s chest, the other down his stomach to his cock. For a moment, Tom just stroked him. Lazy hands playing at his nipple, and petting his cock like a sleepy cat. 

Loki groaned, reveling in the sensation of wet, slippery hands on his skin. He tensed his thighs again. Tom gasped in his ear and started moving again. Sliding his cock against Loki’s balls, fucking the tight channel of his legs. The grip on Loki’s cock went tighter, faster. Loki braced his hands against the wall again, and rode the wave. 

Tom moved fast and faster, whining against Loki’s back. His movements became more erratic as he got closer. Loki moved his own hips, fucking back against Tom’s cock. Tom’s hand on Loki’s cock felt like heaven. 

“I’m… Are you close?” Tom asked, panting against Loki’s back. 

Loki moaned “Yes, just… ahhhhh little… more. Faster?” 

Tom sped up further. Fucking Loki’s thighs, stroking Loki’s cock. “Loki, fuck, Loki!” Tom’s voice spiraled up, screaming around Loki’s name. God, none of Loki’s lovers had ever done that. Screamed his name in the heat of their own release. Loki had just assumed that was a thing that only happened in fiction, but here…  _ Loki! Loki! Loki! _ The words echoed in his head. Loki’s vision went white as he came under Tom’s hand. Loki cried out and shuddered in his lover's arms. He couldn’t hold his own weight anymore, and they both sank to the shower floor. 

Loki could just hear Tom’s breathing above the water, his forehead resting against Loki’s spine. Once he’d gotten his breath back, Loki twisted around so he was facing Tom. The boy hung his head down, curls flat and wet. Loki tipped his face up with a gentle hand. “Doing alright?” 

Tom smiled at him. “God yes.” He surged forward and pulled Loki into his arms. “How could I be anything but? You… Fuck, I never even imagined that you... When I heard you were coming for Christmas I thought I’d be… be stuck just watching you and aching. But this is even better than I’d dreamed. I’m… happy.” He shook his head. “Happy doesn’t even cover it. I’ve wanted you for so long, and I finally have you.” 

Loki’s eyes prickled. He blamed the water, but he knew he was crying. There was something so innocent about Tom’s desire. Part of Loki wanted to say that this whole thing was filthy and wrong, but that would have been an injustice. Tom’s lust was pure in a way that most religions would say was impossible. The boy was in love with him. Tom hadn’t said as much in so many words, but it was obvious. Loki’s own words came back to haunt him. Tom had asked how you knew if you were in love. Lust and love and respect. Loki would be happy to spend the rest of his days with this beautiful, brilliant creature. 

And for a moment, as they sat in the shower, the water going cool, Loki allowed himself to dream that it might actually be possible. 


	7. Chapter 7

Loki awakes with a start. A howl of rage comes from everywhere around him. He curls into the body in front of him, hoping to protect his lover from whatever seeks their blood. 

Rage shatters the air. Something terrible is coming. 

Tom’s bedroom door smashes open to reveal Thor glaring down at them. 

“How could you?” Thor shrieks. “You have defiled my son, monster!” 

Thor is huge, towering above them. Tom scrambles to his feet, trying to block Loki from his father’s rage. Thor growls at the boy and backhands him across the room. Tom hits the far wall and slides down into a crumpled heap on the floor. 

“Tom!” Loki jerks forward, towards his fallen lover, desperate to make sure the boy is alright. 

“Do not feign sentiment, Brother. I know you only care for your own pleasure.” 

“No! I…” 

Thor catches Loki by the throat and pulls him to his feet. 

“I should have killed you long ago, demon,” Thor mutters through clenched teeth. “You’ve always been evil. Rapist. Child desecrator. You have dishonored our family and you will pay for it.” 

The hand around Loki’s throat gets tighter and tighter. Loki clutches at his brother’s wrist, hits it, scratches it, anything to make Thor let go. Rage has made a god out of his brother. His hand is impossibly huge, impossibly tight. Loki’s vision goes dark. White noise rushes past his ears. 

_ So this is it. Dying for my misdeeds at last. _

Before Loki loses his grip on life, he hears a sickening crunch, and everything goes black. 

o0o

“Loki? Loki, are you alright?” 

Loki’s eyes flashed open and he gasped for breath. The room was lit by the lamp on Tom’s nightstand, casting the walls in golden light. 

Frantic blue eyes looked down at Loki. “Are you okay?” Tom’s voice cracked. “Say something?” 

Loki surged up and embraced the boy as tightly as he could. “I’m alright. Are you?” 

Tom nodded and clung to Loki’s shoulders. “You stopped breathing.” 

“I… I did what?” Loki looked around the room. The door was intact, not smashed open by a rage-fueled berserker. “I was dreaming?” 

“I think so. You started jerking around in your sleep, but I couldn’t wake you. Then you stopped breathing. I didn’t know what to do, so I just kept trying to wake you up.” Tom squeezed Loki, but carefully, as though he might break. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 

“Yes. It was just a nightmare.” 

“That’s one hell of a nightmare.” 

Loki took another deep breath. His lungs still functioned. His neck was intact. "It was." 

Tom pulled away just enough so that he could see Loki clearly. "Would it help to talk about it?" 

Loki hesitated. The guilt of the dream was his, not Tom's. But would the boy rest more easily if he knew what happened? "I… I dreamed that your father caught us." Loki did his best to read Tom's expression. He looked worried, perhaps a bit confused. 

"That sounds awful, but why did you stop breathing?" 

"He… he choked me. He might have broken my neck." 

"No!" Tom surged onto another hug, this one even more desperate. "No. No no no no no. Not ag… just no." 

Loki ran a soothing hand up and down the boy's back. "It’s alright, it was just a dream." 

Tom shook his head and sniffed. "It’s not alright! Why didn't I stop him?" 

"You tried." 

Tom pulled back. Loki was startled to see that he was crying. "What happened? Why couldn’t I stop him?" the boy asked through another sniffle. 

"I'm not certain. He knocked you across the room. I think you were unconscious.” 

Tom shook his head. “No. No, I’m supposed to help.” 

“It doesn't matter, it was just a dream." Loki wiped away Tom's tears. "It was just my mind reminding me that I'm guilty. That I should be worried that I'll be caught in your bed. That I am… culpable." 

"You're not! You're not doing anything wrong. I want this more than anything. Don't I get a say in the matter?" 

Loki sighed. "I'm afraid it’s unlikely that you would be taken seriously. It’s far too easy to put the blame on me, and assume that you were tricked.” 

Tom glared down at the duvet. “Like I  _ needed _ to be tricked to want you.” 

Loki shook his head. “It used to be worse, you know. It used to be that the law was different for two men than it was for a man and a woman. The age of consent was actually higher. You wouldn't have had the right to sleep with a man at all until you were twenty-one." 

Tom made a face. "That's horrible." 

"It is." 

"And it's stupid. What on Earth did they think public school boys got up to?" 

Loki laughed. "I couldn't have said it better. And of course we're related, which is a whole extra level of taboo and illegality. And our age difference, which is nearly as objectionable." 

Tom shook his head. "It really is stupid. I mean, it makes sense to have laws that protect people, but I know what I want. Why does nobody care about that?" 

"I care." 

"I know." Tom pulled Loki into a kiss. "I know you care. All of this… anyone who looks at us together will see you as the villain, which isn't true at all. If anything, I forced you." 

Loki held up a hand. "You didn't force me. That takes away my agency as much as your age does to you. I could have pushed you away, I  _ should _ have pushed you away, but I chose this." 

“You did, but you wouldn’t even have thought about it if I hadn’t… pushed the matter.” 

Loki considered this for a moment. “Well, I wouldn’t have  _ acted _ on it, but I already had thought about it. And tried very hard to not think about it anymore.” 

Tom’s lips quirked into a sly smile. “How did that go?” 

“I’ll never know,” Loki replied with a smile of his own. “Someone seduced me before I could do more than think of myself as a dirty old man.” 

“You’re really not that old,” Tom protested. 

“I’m more than twice your age.” 

“Not by a lot!” 

Loki sighed. “I could be a thousand years older than you and I don’t think you’d care.” 

Tom grinned. “Nope. Not if you looked like this, anyway. I admit that if you were just bones, or a mummy or something, I’d probably have second thoughts.” 

“You don’t fancy a touch of necrophilia?” 

Tom blinked innocently at him. “Haven’t we broken enough taboos as it is?” 

“What’s one more taboo between friends?” 

“Mmm, unless you can become a vampire, no deal.” 

Loki laughed and pulled Tom closer. “I’ll see what I can do.” 

o0o

The week was a blur of sex, food, more sex, and suprisingly deep conversations. Loki sent periodic texts to his brother and mother, assuring the family that he and Tom were fine. Tom was still pretending that he was upset with Loki as a babysitter and communicated only using emoji and annoyed cat GIFs. But when he wasn’t being a stereotypical teenager to his parents, Tom devoted himself to driving Loki to exhaustion with sex. Loki got the impression that Tom was trying to avoid thinking about anything but the here and now. Loki couldn’t help but look at a doubtful future. They both knew this couldn’t last. 

They sat cuddled together on the sofa in the living room. 

“I wonder if you could visit during the Easter hols or something?” 

Loki kissed Tom’s temple. “I would love to, but it would be suspicious. Next summer, certainly. Assuming you still want to at that point.” 

Tom pulled away and glared. “What do you mean?” 

Loki sighed. “I know you are not an average or typical teenager, my dearest nephew, but you  _ are _ a teenager. New things will catch your interest, old things will become boring. Such is life.” 

“I would never do that to you!” Tom got to his feet and scowled down at Loki, tears in his eyes. “This isn’t just… just a pash, or… or a crush, or some fling. I...” 

Loki stood and drew the distressed boy into his arms. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to imply that you were fickle or unreliable. I’m sorry. I just…” Loki paused. “I don’t want you to feel obligated. If you decide you don’t want this anymore, I don’t want you to worry about breaking my heart, or me being jealous, or any of those things. It’s very unusual for someone your age to be with the same person for very long, even if your partner was the same age. Given that I am older and have some measure of authority over you, then it would be easy to feel that you don’t have the option to break off the relationship. You do. If you want to stop at any time, just say so.” 

Tom looked up and met Loki’s gaze. “But… but what about you? What do you want?” 

The corner of Loki’s mouth twitched towards a smile. “I’ve loved you since you were five and first asked me for a story. That will never change. But I don’t want to twist that love into something that cannot be discerned from hate. I would rather let go and just go back to being ‘the cool uncle’ than have your enmity. If you want to stop, we stop.” 

“What if I don’t want to stop? What if I want to do this forever?” 

Loki was certain his smile turned sad, but he knew that Tom was fooling himself. “Then we’ll deal with each day as it comes. Once you’re at university, it will be easier to have a somewhat normal relationship. We can see one another more often. It will still be illegal, but at least you’ll be enough over the age of consent for people not to challenge you having an older boyfriend. Unfortunately,” Loki traced a finger along Tom’s cheekbone, “anyone who sees us together will know that we’re kin.” 

Tom sighed and leaned his forehead against Loki’s chest. “This is stupid. Why is it illegal for consenting adults to be in a relationship if they’re related too closely?” 

“Morality, my dear boy. And likely evolution as well. Inbreeding is not good for the species.” 

“Like we’re going to breed.” 

Loki chuckled and kissed the top of Tom’s head. “It’s a thorny problem. I don’t have the answers. I’ll do my best by you, and that’s all I can do.” 

Tom collapsed the few inches between them and clung to Loki like he was drowning. “I love you. I just want us to be okay.” 

Loki’s heart melted. “I love you too, sweet boy.” 

o0o

On New Year’s Eve, Loki and Tom split a bottle of champagne over the course of the evening and made love on the sofa in the living room when their New Year’s kiss became too frantic to bother going upstairs. They both drifted off to sleep there, Tom sprawled over Loki again like their first time together. Most of the time they slept in Tom’s bedroom. Loki had gotten used to sleeping alone since Stephen left. Now he looked forward to sleeping with a warm body in his arms every night. It would be sad to go back to sleeping by himself. 

The night before the rest of the family was due to return, Tom begged Loki to fuck him. The boy came twice with Loki’s cock up his arse, crying and clutching at him as though this was the last time they’d ever see one another. 

“This isn’t the end, my sweet boy,” Loki muttered in his ear. “It’s just a pause. We’ll figure something out.” 

Tom shook his head and clung to Loki until he fell asleep. 

The following morning, Tom’s sheets went into the wash once more. They made love in the shower, partially to not get anything dirty, but also to fulfill Tom’s fantasy one more time. 

Over breakfast, Loki did his best to bring Tom’s spirits up. He told funny stories of his travels until Tom was crying from laughter rather than the depression that snuck up on him whenever he wasn’t occupied with other things. 

The rest of the family was due to be back for lunch, so the pair of them decided to cook for them. 

“I think you should come out to your parents,” Loki said quietly over bubbling pasta water. “I think you’ll feel better about it if they know.” 

“I assume that you  _ don’t _ mean I should tell them about you?” 

“Obviously not. I like my head where it is, thank you.” Loki had intended this to be a joke, but Tom looked stricken. “Sorry, that sounded better when I came up with it.” 

“No, it’s okay.” Tom’s eyes lingered on Loki’s throat before dragging up to his eyes again. “Why do you think I should tell them?” 

“Several reasons. It will explain your behavior and give Thor and Jane something to focus on other than what may have happened while they were gone. Thor remembers what it was like for me when  _ I _ came out, and he’ll be entirely supportive. So will Jane, given her forward-thinking political leanings. There are basically no disadvantages.” 

“What happened when you came out?” Tom asked. “It doesn’t seem like Nana would care.” 

Loki sighed. “She didn’t, particularly. She’s always been very supportive. My father on the other hand… he didn’t approve. Neither did Thor’s father, though Odin never really liked me to begin with. Honestly I think part of the reason my mother and father split up was because Laufey reacted so badly to me being gay.” 

Tom’s eyes went very wide. “Oh. I’d always wondered, but… I don’t know. Having a step-grandfather always seemed a bit weird anyway.” 

“Well he’s not worth paying attention to.” Loki stepped in and kissed Tom’s forehead. “Thor is not perfect. He’s a bit of an oaf, and was a complete terror to be around when we were younger, but he’s a good man and a good father. He had two bad examples to learn from, and learn he did.” 

“Okay. I’ll tell them. There’s no reason to hide  _ that, _ I suppose.” 

Loki smiled. “The world is a more accepting place now than it was when I was your age. And honestly, I don’t think they’ll be that surprised.” 

Tom blushed. “I’m not exactly the most manly specimen.” 

“That has nothing to do with it. You’re just comparing yourself to Thor. I did that for a long time, and believe me, it isn’t worth it. But how ‘manly’ you are has virtually nothing to do with who you want to sleep with, or even what role you play in the bedroom.” Loki grinned. “I’ve topped men who outmassed your father, and they loved every minute of it.” 

Tom blushed even more deeply and giggled. “You are exceptionally good at it, so I guess I can’t blame them.” 

“Thank you.” Loki gave Tom another quick kiss. “Do your best to accept who you are and not compare yourself to anyone else. You are a wonderful, brilliant, attractive young man, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with any part of you.” 

“Oh.” Tom blinked at Loki, then pulled into a desperately tight hug. “Thanks.” 

“You’re quite welcome.” Loki the top of Tom’s head. “And I do mean it.” 

Tom nodded, head still nestled in between Loki’s neck and shoulder. “I know.” He pulled away just enough to see Loki clearly. “Whoever told you that you were a rubbish boyfriend was an idiot.” 

“You realize that my ex is a doctor, don’t you?” 

“He’s still an idiot.” 

Loki chuckled and kissed him. “You’re not wrong.” 

Tom grinned at him. “I know that too.” 

“You’re turning into me, did you know that as well?” 

The grin widened. “I could do worse.” 

“I suppose you could.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wouldn't be me if things didn't get at least a little meta.


	8. Chapter 8

It was so difficult to go back to a feigned distance. Loki was a tactile person, and always had been. He was physically demonstrative to his friends and family, but his interactions with a boyfriend were a whole extra level. His instinct was to constantly touch his significant other every chance he had, and now he had to hide it. He could still touch Tom with a casual hand on the shoulder, and occasional hugs, but it wasn’t the same. There was a careful distance between them, and they both hated it. 

After supper the night the rest of the family came home, Tom cleared his throat and looked around the table nervously. “I… I need to tell you all something.” His eyes flicked to Loki - who silently prayed that Tom wasn’t about to let the cat out of the bag - then back to his parents. “I’m gay. I know that probably isn’t much of a shock, but I needed to tell you. Uncle Loki convinced me that I should let you know why I’ve been so… out of sorts.” 

Loki smiled and patted Tom’s arm, doing his best to look like a proud uncle rather than a man who’d just witnessed his boyfriend come out to his parents. He looked over at Thor and Jane, who were having one of their silent couple conversations. Freya looked bored, but it hardly mattered to her that her older brother fancied boys. 

Jane turned to Tom. “Thank you for telling us. I’m glad you felt comfortable enough to do that. It doesn’t change anything for me. You’re my son and I love you, and who you sleep with has nothing to do with that. We trust you to be safe and responsible.” 

Loki suppressed a wince and saw Tom flinch out of the corner of his eye. That flinch turned into a nod. “Thanks Mum.” 

“Your mother is correct,” Thor added. “I’m sorry that we ever gave you reason to think we would disapprove of your choice in partners.” 

Loki cleared his throat, partially to cover the squeak that threatened to escape his throat, partially to pull Thor’s attention away from a furiously-blushing Tom. “It’s not exactly a choice, Thor.” 

“Aye, of course you’re right, but still…” Thor’s eyes went back to his son. “We support you. It’s your life, after all.” 

“Thanks Dad,” Tom replied, still blushing. 

“Do you have a boyfriend?” Freya asked in a disinterested tone, as though she felt the need to be included, even if she didn’t care. 

“I… sort of.” Tom’s eyes flicked to Loki, then to his parents, then back to his sister. “One of my friends at school… but it’s not serious.” 

Freya shrugged. “Kay.” 

There didn’t seem to be much more to say about the matter. Tom and Freya went up to their rooms for the night. Loki did his best to hide his dismay that he wasn’t joining Tom, and instead turned his attention to Thor, who clearly wanted to talk to him. 

“Thank you, Brother.” 

Loki started and raised an eyebrow. “For what?” 

“Convincing him to speak to us. For making sure that… that he knows he’s loved.” 

For a split second, Loki felt a stab of guilt, but he pushed it aside. “Of course. He’s a good lad, and I knew that you would accept him.” 

“How could I not?” Thor smiled. “The best man I know is gay, after all.” 

Loki blushed. “I don’t deserve that.” 

“No? Well perhaps I was speaking of my son rather than my brother?” 

Loki grumbled and shoved Thor’s shoulder with his own. “Shut it, oaf.” 

Thor looped his arm around Loki’s neck. “I love you too, little brother.” 

Loki shifted his weight, doing his best to knock Thor off balance. Thor grinned and pushed back. It would be easy to fall into the rough patterns of their youth again. To go back to a time when all they did was push one another around, but Loki resisted. 

“I have to go soon,” Loki said. “I can’t trespass on your hospitality for much longer.” 

“You’re always welcome, Loki, you know that.” 

Loki gave Thor a crooked smile. “Thank you. Feel free to… to invite me over, I suppose. I think I’m going to stay put for a while. Travel less, write more.” 

Thor beamed. “We’ll be glad to have you. Will you be moving back to London?” 

Loki nodded and sat on one of the barstools. “I think so. We’ll see if it sticks this time.” 

“I’d be glad to see you settle down.” 

Loki shook his head. “I don’t think that’s in the cards, but we’ll see. I think I got all the wanderlust in the family.” 

Thor chuckled. “That’s certainly true. Say you’ll stay one more day, at least. One of Jane’s friends from work is coming to supper and I think you’d like him.” 

Loki rolled his eyes. “Please tell me you’re not trying to set me up with someone?” 

“Fine, I won’t tell you, then.” Thor dropped his hand down on Loki’s shoulder. “Goodnight little brother.” 

“Goodnight.” 

Loki waited a moment before following Thor up the stairs. He hesitated in the hallway. On his right was Tom’s room, where he’d slept for the past week. On his left was the lonely guest room. Loki brushed his fingers against the blue-painted wood of Tom’s bedroom door, then turned to the guest room. He half-wanted Tom to sneak into his room for the night, but that would be catastrophically stupid, and Tom was _not_ stupid, despite his hormones being in control at the moment. 

With a sigh, Loki went to bed. 

o0o

Jane's friend from work was indeed gay and looking for a partner. The man was a few years older than Loki, and quite attractive. His skin was a lovely mahogany, and had remarkably light brown eyes that looked gold in certain lights. If Loki had been looking for a partner he could do far worse than a late thirty-something astrophysicist. 

As it was, Loki chatted lightly and flirted not at all. At first, Tom seemed nervous about the stranger in their midst - or perhaps he just resented the other man's attentions towards Loki - but relaxed as the evening progressed. 

Eventually Jane's friend got the hint that Loki wasn't interested and turned his attention to other things. He set his conversational skills to the children. 

"You're at Eton, aren't you?" 

Tom looked up and blinked. "Yes sir. I'm in my third year." 

"Ah. What do you plan on studying at university?" 

Loki bit his lip and tried not to laugh. He caught Tom's attention and hid a chuckle with a cough into his napkin. The boy’s eyes sparkled with mirth. The conversation they'd had a week ago about adults asking about university studies was fresh in both their minds. It was clear to both of them that the question was only asked out of propriety. 

Tom dimmed his smile and turned back to their guest. "I plan to read Classics." 

The astrophysicist's eyebrows went up. "That's an unusual field for a young man of this day and age." 

Tom grinned. "I rather like the Ancient Greeks. I think I was an Athenian in a past life." 

Loki burst out laughing. He couldn't help it. "Sorry." 

Tom turned his million-watt smile on Loki. "You think I'm wrong?" 

"Not at all. I just found it an amusing turn of phrase." 

"An Athenian, not a Spartan?" Thor asked. 

Tom shook his head. "Not a warrior, sorry Dad." 

"There's nothing wrong with loving beauty over violence, dear brother." 

Thor grinned at Loki. "I suppose you're right." 

Supper wound down and their guest left shortly after pudding. Loki did not offer his number, nor was he given one. He did manage a few minutes alone with Tom before bed.

"You little devil. An Athenian in a past life?" 

Tom giggled and gave Loki a quick, quiet kiss. "Luckily most people think about the Ancient Athenians as great philosophers first, and boy-lovers second." 

“You’re right of course, but when Thor asked you about Spartans…” Loki chuckled and shook his head. “I don’t know that your father fully understood the implications of his question.” 

_“300_ is one of his favorite films, you know.” Tom grinned. “I had a few pretty uncomfortable moments watching it when I was about thirteen.” 

Loki snickered. “Poor little nephew. Turned on by Gerard Butler in front of your whole family.” 

Tom gave Loki a sly smile. “I didn’t really care for the beard, but the whole thing did give me a new appreciation for the ancient world.” 

“And thus a future was made,” Loki replied with another laugh. 

Tom’s smile dissipated into a frown. “You’re still planning on leaving tomorrow?” 

Loki sighed. “I have to. If I stay much longer we’ll give ourselves away, or just be completely miserable.” 

“Or both,” Tom replied. 

“Or both.” Loki pulled the boy into a hug. “We can still talk, and email. We just have to be careful.” 

Tom clung on silently, holding Loki as though he’d never let go. “I know. I wish… Never mind, it doesn’t matter.” 

Loki sighed and ran his hand up and down Tom’s back. “It will be fine.” 

“I hope so.” 

They stood like that for a long time, just holding one another. 

“I’m going to miss you,” Loki whispered after a long moment. 

“Me too.” Tom squeezed hard and pulled away. “You’ll email me?” 

“I shall.” Loki gave Tom one last kiss. “I’d better go to bed. I have to leave early in the morning.” 

“Okay. Goodnight.” 

o0o  
  


The following morning, Loki caught a ride with Jane on her way to work so she could drop him off at the train station. It was early and Loki’d only had one cup of coffee, so the ride was quiet. When they pulled into the small car park, Loki had to shake himself awake. 

“Thanks for visiting, Loki.” 

Loki gave his sister-in-law a sleepy smile. “Of course. I enjoyed it.” 

“Good. Thor said you were planning on staying in the country this time?” 

“I am. At least for a while.” 

“Well, you’re welcome back whenever you’d like.” Jane smiled. “I really appreciate that you were willing to spend so much time with Tom. I can tell it’s been good for him.” 

“I hope so.” Loki glanced out the windscreen, then back to Jane. “And I’d be happy to do it again if you ever need to get away.” 

Jane laughed. “You’ll probably regret making that offer. I’ll dump my moody teenage son on you the next time I get tired of his constant Grumpy Cat memes.” 

Loki grinned in return. “I have a great deal of tolerance for teenage moodiness.” 

“Better you than me.” 

“Perhaps.” Loki pulled Jane into a hug. “I’d better go. Thank you for your hospitality.” He grabbed his bag and slipped out of the car. 

“Don’t be a stranger,” Jane called after him. 

Loki waved and went to buy his ticket to London. 

  
  
  
  


**Epilogue**

The morning of his sixteenth birthday, Tom received two packages. One was from his mum and dad - and probably his sister - and the other from Loki. Both packages were heavy, but he was far more excited about the one from his uncle than the other from the rest of his family. His grandmother had sent a birthday card with some money. Nana had long ago realized that if she bought Tom books, he would probably already have them. The package from his mum and dad probably _did_ contain books, but they had a better idea of what he already owned. Some of the other boys laughed at him for still using physical books rather than digital, but he liked the feel of paper in his hands. 

It was a while before Tom had the opportunity to open his gifts, but finally in the evening he was able to take the time to look. His instinct was to open the one from Loki first, but he resisted and started with the other. The box from his parents did indeed have books, and all ones he didn’t own yet. He set them aside and turned his attention to the box from Loki. 

Tom sliced open the package, his heart racing. Inside were two worn-looking, large, cloth-bound books with a card on top of them. Tom opened the card first. 

> _My dearest nephew,_
> 
> _I hope this gift is to your liking. You will want to wait until you are alone to look through the books._
> 
> _I think of you often,_
> 
> _Loki_

  
  


Tom grinned. The wording was circumspect, but Tom could read between the lines. He and Loki emailed each other frequently, but they had to hide the nature of their relationship. Their email accounts were under false names, and only ever used to correspond with one another, so they were fairly safe. Having _written_ evidence of an entirely illegal relationship was not something either was willing to risk. Tom considered himself Loki’s boyfriend, and knew Loki felt the same, but they could never be open about it, just because Tom’s father was Loki’s half-brother. 

Tom hated it. 

He raged internally that this man, whom he loved without reservation, was forbidden. He knew that Loki risked imprisonment for their relationship. It was unlikely that Tom would suffer the same fate, since he was younger, but now that he was over the age of consent, the only barrier was their shared blood. He knew there were good reasons for that. Most people needed to be protected from such advances, since it was so likely that the older person would be taking advantage of the younger.

But Tom was not most people. He knew what he wanted and went for it. Taboo and legality be damned. 

Tom shook his head. It wouldn’t do him any good to ruminate on this unhappy topic yet again. He looked around to make sure nobody was nearby, and drew the books out of their cardboard box. The first book was an anthology of poems by Straton of Sardis, a Greek poet that Tom was vaguely familiar with. Something about censorship and expurgated translations popped to mind, but nothing concrete. Tom flipped through the book and blushed furiously after reading a few lines. This was _not_ a censored edition. He quickly shut the book and set it aside for later perusal. 

The second book felt… odd. The weight was off somehow. It looked to be a battered copy of _The Complete Works of Shakespeare_ which Tom already had in a different edition. Loki knew that Tom owned it, since they’d talked about Shakespeare extensively over the Christmas break and used the book as a reference. He frowned and opened the book. It was in very poor condition, the edges foxed and brown from use. It looked like someone had torn out a page from the table of contents. It was certainly not the sort of book he’d ever give as a gift, so Tom wondered what the hell Loki meant by giving it to him. He flipped through a few more pages. To Tom’s surprise, there was a large compartment cut into the middle of the book. The book was large, and there was less than an inch of the original pages around the compartment. 

And there was another box inside that space, and a note on top of the box. 

> _Make 100% certain that you’re alone, lovely boy. Think of me when you use it._

Tom bit his lip, looked around once more, and opened the innocuous-looking, long, narrow, white box. 

He closed the lid a second later, blushing even more hotly. Loki had sent him a butt plug. What the fuck? His uncle-cum-lover had sent him a sex toy for his birthday. Which he couldn’t possibly use anytime soon. A quick wank under the blankets was one thing, but this… This would require time and effort and privacy. And lube. 

Of course now that the possibility was in front of him, Tom couldn’t stop thinking about it. He’d been intrigued by anal sex since he found out it existed. He’d just worried that it would be too painful if not done correctly. And now that he’d had it - and discovered that he loved it - he wanted it again. But Tom did _not_ trust his school boyfriend that much, and fingers just weren’t the same. He opened the box again. The toy was a deep blue and torpedo shaped, with a wide flare at the base. It wasn't very much like a real cock, but that was actually kind of comforting. Tom’d heard horror stories about people losing things up their own bums, and that was not something that he was willing to risk. Just the thought of it was excruciatingly embarrassing. He peered around the toy. He didn’t want to take it out, since someone _might_ walk by. In the box beside the toy was a folded piece of paper which turned out to be care and usage instructions. And below that were several one-use sized packets of lube. 

Loki had thought of everything. 

The book was a perfect hiding place. Nobody would question Tom having two copies of _The Complete Works of Shakespeare._ And now Tom realized why the book was so tattered. Loki had specifically acquired a book that was nearing the end of its lifespan so he didn’t have to deface a perfectly fine copy. He’d probably gotten it from a used book shop’s bargain bin for less than a quid. Tom giggled. The gift was so perfectly Loki. A slightly beaten-up, posh exterior which held a dirty secret, ingeniously hidden. What could be more appropriate? 

Tom pulled his mobile out and texted his parents to let them know he’d received his gifts and thanking them. Mum would probably phone later, but a text would do for the moment. He emailed Loki next. Their email chain was more of a spread out text conversation, but it was more secure than texting. 

_You’re a genius._

A few minutes passed. 

_Have you tried it out?_

Tom giggled. 

_Not yet. You remember what trying to find privacy here is like. Besides, I opened it ten minutes ago._

_You’re completely brilliant._

Another minute passed. 

_Thank you. It’s a useful trick. An illusion of propriety will cover a great deal of hidden fun. Feel free to put other things in the book if you feel the need._

Tom thought for a moment before he responded. 

_Only if you get me more toys._

Tom imagined Loki’s expression, and chuckled. 

_The next time I see you we can go shopping._

Tom swallowed hard. 

_I’d like that. You can demonstrate how to use them._

A long moment passed. Tom wondered if he’s over-stepped, or if Loki had to leave for a moment, or what. Finally the response came through. 

_You’re a bright lad, I’m sure you can figure it out. But I do love hands-on teaching. I look forward to it._

Tom buried his face in his pillow and groaned. 

_Me too. I want you so badly, I’m_

Before Tom could finish the thought, his mobile rang. It was his mother. He finished the message with “Mum is calling” added a heart emoji before hitting send. 

Summer couldn’t come soon enough. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Straton of Sardis is a Greek poet from the second or third century CE who wrote - among other things - an anthology of erotic poetry called “The Boyish Muse”. I think we can all figure out what that was about. 
> 
> Loki's ex is indeed Stephen Strange and the astrophysicist who comes to dinner is Heimdal.
> 
> I'll go hide in my pervert corner now.


End file.
